Chapter 16

About twelve o'clock that night, was born the Catherine you saw at Wuthering Heights: a puny, seven months' child; and two hours after the mother died, having never recovered sufficient consciousness to miss Heathcliff, or know Edgar. The latter's distraction at his bereavement is a subject too painful to be dwelt on; its after effects showed how deep the sorrow sunk. A great addition, in my eyes, was his being left without an heir. I bemoaned that, as I gazed on the feeble orphan; and I mentally abused old Linton for (what was only natural partiality) the securing his estate to his own daughter, instead of his son's. An unwelcomed infant it was, poor thing! It might have wailed out of life, and nobody cared a morsel, during those first hours of existence. We redeemed the neglect afterwards; but its beginning was as friendless as its end is likely to be.

Next morning--bright and cheerful out of doors--stole softened in through the blinds of the silent room, and suffused the couch and its occupant with a mellow, tender glow. Edgar Linton had his head laid on the pillow, and his eyes shut. His young and fair features were almost as deathlike as those of the form beside him, and almost as fixed: but his was the hush of exhausted anguish, and hers of perfect peace. Her brow smooth, her lids closed, her lips wearing the expression of a smile; no angel in heaven could be more beautiful than she appeared. And I partook of the infinite calm in which she lay: my mind was never in a holier frame than while I gazed on that untroubled image of divine rest. I instinctively echoed the words she had uttered a few hours before: `Incomparably beyond and above us all! Whether still on earth or now in heaven, her spirit is at home with God!'

I don't know if it be a peculiarity in me, but I am seldom otherwise than happy while watching in the chamber of death, should no frenzied or despairing mourner share the duty with me. I see a repose that neither earth nor hell can break, and I feel an assurance of the endless and shadowless hereafter--the Eternity they have entered--where life is boundless in its duration, and love in its sympathy, and joy in its fulness. I noticed on that occasion how much selfishness there is even in a love like Mr Linton's, when he so regretted Catherine's blessed release! To be sure, one might have doubted, after the wayward and impatient existence she had led, whether she merited a haven of peace at last. One might doubt in seasons of cold reflection; but not then, in the presence of her corpse. It asserted its own tranquillity, which seemed a pledge of equal quiet to its former inhabitant.

Do you believe such people are happy in the other world, sir? I'd give a great deal to know.

I declined answering Mrs Dean's question, which struck me as something heterodox. She proceeded--

Retracing the course of Catherine Linton, I fear we have no right to think she is; but we'll leave her with her Maker.

The master looked asleep, and I ventured soon after sunrise to quit the room and steal out to the pure refreshing air. The servants thought me gone to shake off the drowsiness of my protracted watch; in reality, my chief motive was seeing Mr Heathcliff. If he had remained among the larches all night, he would have heard nothing of the stir at the Grange; unless, perhaps, he might catch the gallop of the messenger going to Gimmerton. If he had come nearer, he would probably be aware, from the lights flitting to and fro, and the opening and shutting of the outer doors, that all was not right within. I wished, yet feared, to find him. I felt the terrible news must be told, and I longed to get it over; but how to do it, I did not know. He was there--at least a few yards farther in the park; leant against an old ash tree, his hat off, and his hair soaked with the dew that had gathered on the budded branches, and fell pattering round him. He had been standing a long time in that position, for I saw a pair of ousels passing and repassing scarcely three feet from him, busy in building their nest, and regarding his proximity no more than that of a piece of timber. They flew off at my approach, and he raised his eyes and spoke--

`She's dead!' he said; `I've not waited for you to learn that. Put your handkerchief away--don't snivel before me. Damn you all! she wants none of your tears!'

I was weeping as much for him as her; we do sometimes pity creatures that have none of the feeling either for themselves or others; and when I first looked into his face, I perceived that he had got intelligence of the catastrophe; and a foolish notion struck me that his heart was quelled and he prayed, because his lips moved and his gaze was bent on the ground.

`Yes, she's dead!' I answered, checking my sobs and drying my cheeks. `Gone to heaven, I hope; where we may, everyone, join her, if we take due warning and leave our evil ways to follow good!'

`Did she take due warning,then?' asked Heathcliff, attempting a sneer. `Did she die like a saint? Come, give me a true history of the event. How did--'

He endeavoured to pronounce the name, but could not manage it; and compressing his mouth he held a silent combat with his inward agony, defying, meanwhile, my sympathy with an unflinching ferocious stare. `How did she die?' he resumed at last--fain, notwithstanding his hardihood, to have a support behind him; for, after the struggle, he trembled, in spite of himself, to his very finger-ends.

`Poor wretch!' I thought; `you have a heart and nerves the same as your brother men! Why should you be anxious to conceal them? Your pride cannot blind God! You tempt Him to wring them, till He forces a cry of humiliation.

`Quietly as a lamb!' I answered aloud. `She drew a sigh, and stretched herself, like a child reviving, and sinking again to sleep; and five minutes after I felt one little pulse at her heart, and nothing more!'

`And--did she ever mention me?' he asked, hesitating, as if he dreaded the answer to his question would introduce details that he could not bear to hear.

`Her senses never returned; she recognized nobody from the time you left her,' I said. `She lies with a sweet smile on her face; and her latest ideas wandered back to pleasant early days. Her life closed in a gentle dream--may she wake as kindly in the other world!'

`May she wake in torment!' he cried, with frightful vehemence, stamping his foot, and groaning in a sudden paroxysm of ungovernable passion. `Why, she's a liar to the end! Where is she? Not there--not in heaven--not perished--where? Oh! you said you cared nothing for my sufferings! And I pray one prayer--I repeat it till my tongue stiffens--Catherine Earnshaw, may you not rest as long as I am living! You said I killed you--haunt me, then! The murdered do haunt their murderers, I believe. I know that ghosts have wandered on earth. Be with me always--take any form--drive me mad! only do not leave me in this abyss, where I cannot find you! Oh, God! it is unutterable! I cannot live without my life! I cannot live without my soul!'

He dashed his head against the knotted trunk; and, lifting up his eyes, howled, not like a man, but like a savage beast getting goaded to death with knives and spears. I observed several splashes of blood about the bark of the tree, and his hand and forehead were both stained; probably the scene I witnessed was a repetition of others acted during the night. It hardly moved my compassion--it appalled me: still, I felt reluctant to quit him so. But the moment he recollected himself enough to notice me watching, he thundered a command for me to go, and I obeyed. He was beyond my skill to quiet or console!

Mrs Linton's funeral was appointed to take place on the Friday following her decease; and till then her coffin remained uncovered, and strewn with flowers and scented leaves, in the great drawing-room. Linton spent his days and nights there, a sleepless guardian; and--a circumstance concealed from all but me--Heathcliff spent his nights, at least, outside, equally a stranger to repose. I held no communication with him; still, I was conscious of his design to enter, if he could; and on the Tuesday, a little after dark, when my master, from sheer fatigue, had been compelled to retire a couple of hours, I went and opened one of the windows; moved by his perseverance, to give him a chance of bestowing on the faded image of his idol one final adieu. He did not omit to avail himself of the opportunity, cautiously and briefly: too cautiously to betray his presence by the slightest noise. Indeed, I shouldn't have discovered that he had been there, except for the disarrangement of the drapery about the corpse's face, and for observing on the floor a curl of light hair, fastened with a silver thread; which, on examination, I ascertained to have been taken from a locket hung round Catherine's neck. Heathcliff had opened the trinket and cast out its contents, replacing them by a black lock of his own. I twisted the two, and enclosed them together.

Mr Earnshaw was, of course, invited to attend the remains of his sister to the grave; and he sent no excuse, but he never came; so that, besides her husband, the mourners were wholly composed of tenants and servants. Isabella was not asked.

The place of Catherine's interment, to the surprise of the villagers, was neither in the chapel under the carved monument of the Lintons, nor yet by the tombs of her own relations, outside. It was dug on a green slope in a corner of the kirkyard, where the wall is so low that heath and bilberry plants have climbed over it from the moor; and peat mould almost buries it. Her husband lies in the same spot now; and they have each a simple headstone above, and a plain grey block at their feet, to mark the graves.

第二天——外面晴朗而爽快——清晨悄悄地透过这寂静的屋子的窗帘,一道悦目而柔和的光亮映照在卧榻和睡在上面的人的身上。埃德加·林惇的头靠在枕上,他的眼睛闭着。他那年轻漂亮的面貌几乎跟他旁边的人的姿容一样,如同死去一般,也差不多一样地纹丝不动:可是他的脸是极端悲痛之后的安静,而她的确是真正的宁静。她的容貌是柔和的,眼睑闭着,嘴唇带着微笑的表情;天上的天使也不能比她看来更为美丽。我也被她安眠中的无限恬静所感染:当我凝视着这神圣的安息者那无忧无虑的面貌时,我的心境从来没有比这时更神圣。我不自觉地模仿她在几小时前说出的话,“无可比拟地超越我们,而且在我们所有的人之上!无论她还在人间,或是现在已在天堂,她的灵魂如今是与上帝同在了!”

我不知道这是不是我的特性,但是,当我守灵时,如果没有发狂的或绝望的哀悼者跟我分担守灵的义务,我是很少有不快乐的时候的。我看见一种无论人间或地狱都不能破坏的安息,我感到今后有一种无止境、无阴影的信心——他们所进入的永恒——在那儿,生命无限延续,爱情无限和谐,欢乐无限充溢。在那时候,我注意到当林惇先生如此痛惜凯瑟琳的美满的超脱时,甚至在他那样的一种爱情里也存有多少自私成分!的确,有人可以怀疑,在她度过了任性的、急躁的一生后,到末了她配不配得到和平的安息之处。遇上冷静回想的时候,人家是可以怀疑;可是,在她的灵前,却不能。它保持着它自己的宁静,仿佛对以前和它同住的人也给了同等宁静的诺言。

先生,你相信这样的人在另一个世界里是快乐的吗?我多想知道。

我拒绝回答丁太太的问题,这问题使我觉得有点邪道。她接下去说:

追述凯瑟琳·林惇的一生历程,恐怕我们都没权利认为她是快乐的;但是我们就把她交给她的造物者吧。

主人看来是睡着了。日出不久,我就大胆离开这屋子,偷偷出去吸一下清新的空气。仆人们以为我是去摆脱我那因长久守夜而产生的困倦;其实,我主要的动机是想见到希刺克厉夫。如果他整夜都待在落叶松的树林中,他就听不到田庄里的骚动;除非,也许他会听到送信人到吉默吞去的马蹄疾驰声。如果他走近些,他大概会从灯火闪来闪去,以及外面那些门的开开关关,发觉里面出事了。我想去找他,可是又怕去找他。我觉得一定得告诉他这个可怕的消息,我渴望快点熬过去,可是我又不知道该怎么说。他在那儿——在果树园里至少有几码远,靠着一棵老杨树,他没戴帽子,他的头发被那聚在含苞欲放的枝头上的露水淋得湿漉漉的,而且还在他周围淅沥淅沥地滴着。他就是照那个样子站了很久,因为我看见有一对鸫离他还不到三尺,跳过来跳过去,忙着筑它们的巢,把就在附近的他当作不过是块木头而已。我一走过去,它们飞开了,他抬起眼睛,说话了:

“她死了!”他说,“我没等你告诉就知道了。把手绢收起来——别在我跟前一把鼻涕一把泪的。你们都该死!她才不要你们的眼泪哩!”

我哭,是为她,也为他;我们有时候会怜悯那些对自己或对别人都没有一点怜悯感觉的人。我乍一看到他的脸,就看出来他已经知道这场灾祸了;我忽然愚蠢地想到他的心是镇定下来了,而且他还在祈祷,因为他的嘴唇在颤动,他的目光凝视着地上。

“是的,她死了!”我回答,压抑住我的抽泣,擦干我的脸。“我希望,是上天堂了;如果我们接受应得的警告,改邪归正,我们每个人都可以去那里和她相遇。”

“那么她也接受了应得的警告吗?”希刺克厉夫问,试图讥笑一下。”她是像个圣徒似的死去吗?来,告诉我这事的真实情况。到底——?”

他努力想说出那个名字,可是说不出;他闭紧嘴,跟他内心的苦痛进行沉默的斗争,同时又以毫不畏缩的凶狠的目光蔑视我的同情。

“她是怎么死的?”终于,他又开口了——虽然他很坚强,却也想在他背后找个靠一靠的地方;因为,在这场斗争之后,他不由自主地浑身颤抖着,连他的手指尖也在抖。

“可怜的人!”我想,“你也有跟别人一样的心和神经呀!你为什么一定要把这些隐藏起来呢?你的骄傲蒙蔽不了上帝!你使得上帝来绞扭你的心和神经,一直到他迫使你发出屈服的呼喊为止。”

“像羔羊一样地安静!”我高声回答。“她叹口气,欠伸一下,像一个孩子醒过来,随后又沉入睡眠;五分钟后我觉得她心里微微跳动一下,就再也不跳了!”

“还有——她就没有提过我吗?”他犹豫不决地问着,好像是唯恐对他这问题的答复将会引出一些他不忍听的细节。

“她的知觉根本没有恢复过;从你离开她那时起,她就谁也不认得了!”我说。“她脸上带着甜蜜的微笑躺着;她最后的思念回到愉快的儿时去了。她的生命是在一个温柔的梦里终止的——愿她在另一个世界里也平和地醒来!”

“愿她在苦痛中醒来!”他带着可怕的激动喊着,跺着脚,由于一阵无法控制的激情发作而呻吟起来。“唉,她到死都是一个撒谎的人呀!她在哪儿?不在那里——不在天堂——没有毁灭——在哪儿?啊!你说过不管我的痛苦!我只要做一个祷告——我要重复地说,直到我的舌头僵硬——凯瑟琳·恩萧,只要在我还活着的时候;愿你也不得安息!你说我害了你——那么,缠着我吧!被害的人是缠着他的凶手的。我相信——我知道鬼魂是在人世间漫游的。那就永远跟着我——采取任何形式——把我逼疯吧!只要别把我撇在这个深渊里,这儿我找不到你!啊,上帝!真是没法说呀!没有我的生命,我不能活下去!没有我的灵魂,我不能活下去啊!”

他把头朝着那多节疤的树干撞;抬起眼睛,吼叫着,不像一个人,却像一头野兽被刀和矛刺得快死了。我看见树皮上有好几块血迹,他的手和前额都沾满了血;大概我亲眼所见的景象在夜里已经重复做过几次了。这很难引起我的同情——这使我胆战心惊;但我还是不愿就这么离开他。然而,他刚刚清醒过来,发现我望着他,就吼叫着命令我走开,我服从了。我可没有那个本事使他安静下来,或者能给他慰藉!

林惇夫人的安葬定于她死后那个星期五举行;在出殡之前,她的灵柩还没合上,撒着鲜花香叶,停放在大厅里。林惇日日夜夜在那儿守着,成了一个不眠的保卫者;还有——这是除了我以外谁都不知道的一件事情——希刺克厉夫夜夜在外面度过,至少,也是个同样不眠的客人。我没有跟他联系:可我晓得如果他能够,他是想进来的;到了星期四,天黑后不久,当我的主人迫于极度的疲劳,去休息一两个钟头的时候,我就打开一扇窗户;我被他的坚韧不拔感动了,便给他一个机会,让他对他的偶像的褪色的面貌作一个最后的告别。他没有错过这个机会,谨慎而且迅速;谨慎得一点声音都没有,免得让人知道他来了。的确,要不是死人脸上的盖布有点乱,而且我看见地板上有一绺淡色的头发,我都不会发现他来过了。那头发是用一根银线扎着的,仔细一看,我断定是从凯瑟琳脖子上挂着的一只小金盒里拿出来的。希刺克厉夫把这小装饰品打开了,把里面的东西扔出来,装进他自己的一绺黑发。我把这两绺头发拧成一股,一起都放进去了。

恩萧先生当然被邀请来参加他妹妹的遗体下葬仪式;他没有任何推脱的话,可他始终没来。因此,除了她丈夫之外,送殡的全是佃户和仆人,伊莎贝拉没有得到邀请。

村里人很奇怪,凯瑟琳的安葬地点不在礼拜堂里林惇家族的已刻了字的石碑下面,也不在外面她自己家人的坟墓旁边,却是埋在墓园一角的青草坡上,在那儿,墙是这么矮,以致那些带花的长青灌木丛和覆盆子之类都从旷野那边爬过来,泥煤土丘几乎要把它埋没了。如今她丈夫也葬在同一个地点,他们坟上各竖立一块简单的石碑,它们的脚下也各有一块平平的灰石,作为坟墓的标志。