Just ahead, at the edge of the stream, Denver couldsee her silhouette, standing barefoot in the water, liking her black skirts up above her calves, thebeautiful head lowered in rapt attention. Blinking fresh tears Denver approached her — eager for a word, a sign of forgiveness.
Denver took off her shoes and stepped into the water with her. It took a moment for her to drag hereyes from the spectacle of Beloved's head to see what she was staring at.
A turtle inched along the edge, turned and climbed to dry ground. Not far behind it was anotherone, headed in the same direction. Four placed plates under a hovering motionless bowl. Behindher in the grass the other one moving quickly, quickly to mount her. The impregnable strength ofhim — earthing his feet near her shoulders. The embracing necks — hers stretching up toward hisbending down, the pat pat pat of their touching heads. No height was beyond her yearning neck,stretched like a finger toward his, risking everything outside the bowl just to touch his face. Thegravity of their shields, clashing, countered and mocked the floating heads touching. Beloveddropped the folds of her skirt. It spread around her. The hem darkened in the water.
OUT OF SIGHT of Mister's sight, away, praise His name, from the smiling boss of roosters, PaulD began to tremble. Not all at once and not so anyone could tell. When he turned his head, aimingfor a last look at Brother, turned it as much as the rope that connected his neck to the axle of abuckboard allowed, and, later on, when they fastened the iron around his ankles and clamped thewrists as well, there was no outward sign of trembling at all. Nor eighteen days after that when hesaw the ditches; the one thousand feet of earth — five feet deep, five feet wide, into which woodenboxes had been fitted. A door of bars that you could lift on hinges like a cage opened into threewalls and a roof of scrap lumber and red dirt. Two feet of it over his head; three feet of open trenchin front of him with anything that crawled or scurried welcome to share that grave calling itselfquarters. And there were forty-five more. He was sent there after trying to kill Brandywine, theman schoolteacher sold him to. Brandywine was leading him, in a coffle with ten others, throughKentucky into Virginia. He didn't know exactly what prompted him to try — other than Halle,Sixo, Paul A, Paul F and Mister. But the trembling was fixed by the time he knew it was there.
Still no one else knew it, because it began inside. A flutter of a kind, in the chest, then the shoulderblades. It felt like rippling — gentle at first and then wild. As though the further south they led himthe more his blood, frozen like an ice pond for twenty years, began thawing, breaking into piecesthat, once melted, had no choice but to swirl and eddy. Sometimes it was in his leg. Then again itmoved to the base of his spine. By the time they unhitched him from the wagon and he sawnothing but dogs and two shacks in a world of sizzling grass, the roiling blood was shaking him toand fro. But no one could tell. The wrists he held out for the bracelets that evening were steady aswere the legs he stood on when chains were attached to the leg irons. But when they shoved himinto the box and dropped the cage door down, his hands quit taking instruction. On their own, theytraveled. Nothing could stop them or get their attention. They would not hold his penis to urinateor a spoon to scoop lumps of lima beans into his mouth. The miracle of their obedience came withthe hammer at dawn.
All forty-six men woke to rifle shot. All forty-six. Three whitemen walked along the trenchunlocking the doors one by one. No one stepped through. When the last lock was opened, the threereturned and lifted the bars, one by one. And one by one the blackmen emerged — promptly and without the poke of a rifle butt if they had been there more than a day; promptly with the butt if,like Paul D, they had just arrived. When all forty-six were standing in a line in the trench, anotherrifle shot signaled the climb out and up to the ground above, where one thousand feet of the besthand-forged chain in Georgia stretched. Each man bent and waited. The first man picked up theend and threaded it through the loop on his leg iron. He stood up then, and, shuffling a little,brought the chain tip to the next prisoner, who did likewise. As the chain was passed on and eachman stood in the other's place, the line of men turned around, facing the boxes they had come outof. Not one spoke to the other. At least not with words. The eyes had to tell what there was to tell:
"Help me this mornin; 's bad"; "I'm a make it"; "New man"; "Steady now steady."Chain-up completed, they knelt down. The dew, more likely than not, was mist by then. Heavysometimes and if the dogs were quiet and just breathing you could hear doves. Kneeling in the mistthey waited for the whim of a guard, or two, or three. Or maybe all of them wanted it. Wanted itfrom one prisoner in particular or none — or all.
"Breakfast? Want some breakfast, nigger?""Yes, sir.""Hungry, nigger?""Yes, sir.""Here you go."Occasionally a kneeling man chose gunshot in his head as the price, maybe, of taking a bit offoreskin with him to Jesus. Paul D did not know that then. He was looking at his palsied hands,smelling the guard, listening to his soft grunts so like the doves', as he stood before the mankneeling in mist on his right. Convinced he was next, Paul D retched — vomiting up nothing at all.
An observing guard smashed his shoulder with the rifle and the engaged one decided to skip thenew man for the time being lest his pants and shoes got soiled by nigger puke.
"Hiiii"It was the first sound, other than "Yes, sir" a blackman was allowed to speak each morning, andthe lead chain gave it everything he had. "Hiiii!" It was never clear to Paul D how he knew whento shout that mercy. They called him Hi Man and Paul D thought at first the guards told him whento give the signal that let the prisoners rise up off their knees and dance two-step to the music ofhand forged iron. Later he doubted it. He believed to this day that the "Hiiii!" at dawn and the"Hoooo!" when evening came were the responsibility Hi Man assumed because he alone knewwhat was enough, what was too much, when things were over, when the time had come.
They chain-danced over the fields, through the woods to a trail that ended in the astonishing beautyof feldspar, and there Paul D's hands disobeyed the furious rippling of his blood and paid attention.
With a sledge hammer in his hands and Hi Man's lead, the men got through. They sang it out andbeat it up, garbling the words so they could not be understood; tricking the words so their syllablesyielded up other meanings. They sang the women they knew; the children they had been; theanimals they had tamed themselves or seen others tame. They sang of bosses and masters andmisses; of mules and dogs and the shamelessness of life. They sang lovingly of graveyards andsisters long gone. Of pork in the woods; meal in the pan; fish on the line; cane, rain and rockingchairs.
And they beat. The women for having known them and no more,no more; the children for having been them but never again. They killed a boss so often and socompletely they had to bring him back to life to pulp him one more time. Tasting hot mealcakeamong pine trees, they beat it away. Singing love songs to Mr. Death, they smashed his head.
More than the rest, they killed the flirt whom folks called Life for leading them on. Making themthink the next sunrise would be worth it; that another stroke of time would do it at last. Only whenshe was dead would they be safe. The successful ones — the ones who had been there enoughyears to have maimed, mutilated, maybe even buried her — kept watch over the others who werestill in her cock-teasing hug, caring and looking forward, remembering and looking back. Theywere the ones whose eyes said, "Help me, 's bad"; or "Look out," meaning this might be the day Ibay or eat my own mess or run, and it was this last that had to be guarded against, for if onepitched and ran — all, all forty-six, would be yanked by the chain that bound them and no tellingwho or how many would be killed. A man could risk his own life, but not his brother's. So the eyessaid, "Steady now," and "Hang by me."Eighty-six days and done. Life was dead. Paul D beat her butt all day every day till there was not awhimper in her. Eighty-six days and his hands were still, waiting serenely each rat-rustling nightfor "Hiiii!" at dawn and the eager clench on the hammer's shaft. Life rolled over dead. Or so hethought.
It rained.
Snakes came down from short-leaf pine and hemlock.
It rained.
Cypress, yellow poplar, ash and palmetto drooped under five days of rain without wind. By theeighth day the doves were nowhere in sight, by the ninth even the salamanders were gone. Dogslaid their ears down and stared over their paws. The men could not work. Chain-up was slow,breakfast abandoned, the two-step became a slow drag over soupy grass and unreliable earth.
It was decided to lock everybody down in the boxes till it either stopped or lightened up so awhiteman could walk, damnit, without flooding his gun and the dogs could quit shivering. Thechain was threaded through forty-six loops of the best hand-forged iron in Georgia.
It rained.
就在前面,在小溪边,丹芙能看见她的剪影:她赤脚立在水中,黑裙子提到腿肚上,美丽的头全神贯注地低垂着。
丹芙眨落新鲜的眼泪,靠近她———渴盼着一句话,一个宽恕的信号。
丹芙脱下鞋子,在她身旁将双脚踏入水中。过了一会儿,她才把目光从宠儿奇妙的头上移开,去看她正在盯着什么看。
一只乌龟沿着河岸徐行,拐了个弯,爬向干燥的地面。身后不远处是另一只,头朝着同一个方向。四只盘子各就各位,安置在一只踟蹰不前的碗钵下面。从雌龟身后的草丛里,那只雄龟飞快地爬出来,飞快地骑在她的背上。他勇不可挡———就在她的肩膀旁,他把脚埋进土里。脖子纠缠起来———她的往上伸,他的朝下弯,他们相亲的头拍打,拍打,拍打。她焦渴的脖颈抬得比什么都高,宛如一根手指,伸向他的脖颈,冒着伸出碗钵外面的一切危险,只是为了触到他的脸。沉甸甸的甲壳彼此撞击,抗议并嘲笑着他们那游离出来相亲的龟头。
宠儿撂下裙褶。裙子在她周围展开。裙摆浸在河水中,颜色暗了下来。
在“先生”的视线达不到的地方,谢天谢地,远离了公鸡们那微笑着的首领,保罗·D开始颤抖。不是突然开始的,也不是可以轻易觉察出来的。当他的脖子被绳子拴在马车轴上,而他在绳子允许的范围内尽可能地扭过头、希望最后看一眼“兄弟”的时候,还有后来,当他们把镣铐铐上他的脚踝和手腕的时候,都根本没有颤抖的明显迹象。就是十八天以后,当他看见壕沟的时候,也仍然没有任何迹象。那是一道一千英尺长的泥土沟———有五英尺深、五英尺宽,正好放进那些木头匣子。匣子有道栅栏门,可以用绞索提起,好像打开一个笼子,打开后就能看见三面墙和一个用 废木材和红土做成的屋顶。他头顶上有两英尺空间,面前有三英尺敞开的壕沟,供所有爬行的和疾走的东西来与他分享这个叫做住处的坟坑。这样的坟坑另外还有四十五个。他被送到那里是因为他企图杀死“学校老师”把他卖给的那个男人,“白兰地酒”。本来,“白兰地酒”正领着他和其他十个奴隶组成的一队人,穿过肯塔基前往弗吉尼亚。他搞不清楚究竟是什么促使他去以身试法———除了因为黑尔、西克索、保罗·A、保罗·F和“先生”。可是等他意识到的时候,颤抖已经固定不去了。
然而始终没有别的人知道,因为它发自内部。是一种颤动,先是在胸口,再传递到肩胛。感觉起来像涟漪一样———开始时柔和,然后就转为猛烈。似乎他们越将他领往南方,他的像冰封的池塘一样冻结了二十年的血液就越开始融化,裂成碎块,而一旦融化了,就只能打着旋儿飞转,此外别无选择。有时候颤抖是在他的腿里。然后再次传到他的脊椎底部。等他们将他从大车上解下来,他看到眼前这个野草咝咝作响的世界,除了狗群和两间小木屋以外一无所有,这时,愤怒的血液已经激得他前后摇晃。可是没有人能看出来。那天晚上,他伸出手来戴手铐,手腕很稳健;他们往他脚镣上拴铁链时,他那支撑身体的双腿也同样稳健。可是当他们把他塞进匣子、放下笼门的时候,他的手再也不听话了。它们自己活动起来。什么都无法止住它们,或者吸引它们的注意力。它们拒绝握着他的阴茎撒尿,或者拿着勺子舀一勺利马豆送进嘴里。直到黎明来临,该去抡大锤时,它们才奇迹般地驯服了。
一声枪响,四十六个男人一齐醒来。所有四十六个。三个白人沿沟走过,一把接一把地打开门锁。没人迈出一步。等到最后一把锁打开,三个人返回来提起栅栏,一扇接一扇。然后黑人们鱼贯而出———那些起码在里面待上过一天的,动作很利索,不会被枪托捣中;若是新来乍到,比如保罗·D,则不免挨上一枪托,才会麻利些。当四十六人全部在沟里站成一列时,另一声枪响命令他们爬出来,爬到头顶的地面上,于是一千英尺长的、佐治亚最好的手工锁链抻开来。每个人都弯腰等着。头一个拾起锁链的一头,穿进脚镣上的铁环。然后他站起身来,拖了几步,把链子递给下一个犯人,那个人就照他的样子做。等到链子一直传到头,每个人都站到了别人的位置上,这一列男人就掉转头,面向他们刚刚爬出的匣子。没有一个人对另一个说话。至少不用语言。要想说什么得用眼睛:
“今儿早上帮我一把,糟透了”;“我活着”;“新来的”;“别急,现在别急”。
锁链全部上好,他们跪下来。露水这时候多半已经变成了雾气,有时还很重。如果狗很安静,只是呼吸,你还能听见鸽子的声响。他们跪在雾里,等待着一个、两个或者三个看守异想天开的折磨。也许他们三个都喜欢心血来潮。或者针对某个特定的犯人,或者不针对任何人———或者针对所有人。
“早餐?想吃早餐吗,黑鬼?
”
“是,先生。
”
“饿了,黑鬼?
”
“是,先生。
”
“去你妈的吧。
”
偶尔,一个跪着的男人也许会选择脑袋上挨枪子儿,作为带着一点包皮去见耶稣的代价。保罗·D当时还不知道那个。当看守站在他右边雾中跪着的那个男人面前时,他正在端详自己不住痉挛的手,一边闻着看守的气味,一边听着看守酷似鸽子的沉闷的咕哝声。保罗·D断定下一个是自己了,便干呕起来———实际上什么也没吐出来。一个眼尖的看守举起枪死命去捣他的肩膀,那个动手的看守决定暂时跳过这个新来的,以免裤子和鞋被黑鬼呕出的东西弄脏。
“嗨———!”
这是除了“是,先生”之外,其中一个黑人每天早晨允许发出的第一声呼喊,因为在锁链上领头,他才有了这一切权力。
“嗨———!”保罗·D始终搞不明白,他怎么知道什么时候喊出那一声悲悯。他们叫他“嗨师傅”。保罗·D起先以为是看守告诉他什么时候发出信号,让犯人们爬起来跟着手工镣铐的音乐跳两步舞的。后来他才纳闷起来。他至今依然相信,黎明的“嗨———!”和傍晚的“呼———!”是“嗨师傅”主动承担的责任,因为只有他一个人知道多少是足够,多少是过分,何时事情了结,何时时机已到。
他们带着锁链一路舞过田野,穿过树林,来到一条小径上;小径尽头是一座美得惊人的长石矿,在那里,保罗·D的双手抵住了血液中愤怒的涟漪,将注意力集中起来。在“嗨师傅”的带领下,男人们手抡长柄大铁锤,苦熬过来。他们唱出心中块垒,再砸碎它;篡改歌词,好不让别 人听懂;玩文字游戏,好让音节生出别的意思。他们唱着与他们相识的女人;唱着他们曾经是过的孩子;唱着他们自己驯养或者看见别人驯养的动物。他们唱着工头、主人和小姐;唱着骡子、狗和生活的无耻。他们深情地唱着坟墓和去了很久的姐妹。唱林中的猪肉;唱锅里的饭菜;唱钓丝上的鱼儿;唱甘蔗、雨水和摇椅。
他们砸着。砸着他们从前曾经认识、现在却不再拥有的女人;砸着他们从前曾经是过、却永不会再是的孩子。他们如此频繁、如此彻底地砸死一个工头,结果不得不让他活过来,好再一次把他砸成肉酱。他们在松林中间品尝热蛋糕,又将它砸跑。他们一边为死亡先生唱着情歌,一边砸碎他的脑袋。更有甚者,他们砸死了那个人们称之为生命的骚货,就是她引领着他们前进,让他们觉得太阳再次升起是值得的;钟声的再一次鸣响终将了结一切。只有让她死去他们才会安全。成功者们———那些在里面待足了年头,已将她残害、切断手足,甚至埋葬了的人———一直留心着其余那些仍然处在她淫荡怀抱里的人,那些牵挂和瞻望着、牢记和回顾着的人们。就是这些人,依然用眼睛说着“救救我,糟透了”,说着“小心啊”,意思是:很可能就是今天,我得吠叫、疯掉,或者逃跑了,而最后这一点是必须提高警惕、严加防范的,因为如果有一个逃掉了———那么,所有、所有四十六个人,就会被拴住他们的锁链拖走,说不准会有谁、会有多少个要被杀掉。一个人可以拿自己的性命冒险,却不能拿兄弟们的冒险。于是,他们用眼睛说,“现在别急”,说,“有我在呢”。
八十六天,干完了。生命死了。保罗·D整天砸她的屁股,直到她咽了气为止。八十六天过去,他的手不抖了,在耗子猖獗的每一个夜晚,他平静地等待着黎明的一声“嗨———!”,热切地渴望去握紧大锤把儿。生命翻过身去死掉了。至少他是这么想的。
下雨了。
蛇从短针松和铁杉树上爬下来。
下雨了。
柏树、黄杨、白杨和棕榈经历了五天无风的大雨,垂下头来。到了第八天,再也看不见鸽子了;到第九天,就连蝾螈都没了。狗耷拉着耳朵,盯着自己的爪子出神。男人们没法干活了。锁链松了,早饭废除了,两步舞变成了稀乎乎的草地和不坚实的泥浆地上面拖拖拉拉的步伐。
最后的决定是把所有人都锁在地下的匣子里,直到雨停下或者减弱,这样,一个白人单独就可以巡视,同时枪又挨不着雨淋,狗也不必打哆嗦了,他妈的。锁链穿过四十六个佐治亚最好的手工镣铐的铁环。
下雨了。