I lie on my back on the floor in my living room, with my legs up against the wall and my feet resting on the windowsill, studying for a school assignment assigned by Miss My Lai. The assignment is to be done in English. The assignment includes writing an essay on the Battle of Saigon and later reciting the essay in front of the class.
I haven't started writing the essay, but now lying on my back on the floor, I recite my improvisation of the Battle of Saigon in English.
I hear kids' voices coming from the front of my house, and look out of the window to see what's going on. I see my neighbor's kids sitting along the top of my concrete fence, so I say, "What are you guys sitting here for?"
"We like to listen to you speak in English. It's so cool you can speak English without skipping a beat. Can you tell us the easiest and best way to learn to speak English?"
I say, "Don't sweat it, I'll teach you to speak English almost as well as native. But take notice, I only speak English in a mechanistic manner of a parrot, rattling off the Battle of Saigon, reciting it but hoping no one will ask what my words mean."
They say, "But it's still cool to be able to speak English in any way, so please tell us how to do it."
I say, "When you have to learn to speak a foreign language, say it out loud because saying it in a whisper will take longer to stamp words on your memory. By saying it out loud, you make the sounds with your mouth, hear the sounds with your ears, and get the words into your head to learn how to speak quicker. I tell you what, that's how it works for me. Try it for yourself."
They say, "Are you sure we can learn to speak English that way?"
I say. "Hey! It's free advice. If it doesn't work for you, you don't get your money back because you didn't pay me in the first place."
We scurry into Miss My Lai's classroom. She stands looking down at her watch and holding up her rubber ruler at the ready, to smack our knuckles with it for being late. She counts, "Seven, six, five,…"
Tin says, "We're four seconds early."
With a small smile on her lips, Miss My Lai lowers the ruler and lays it down on her desk.
Clapping her hands, Miss My Lai says, "Hand in your essay on the Battle of Saigon, then come up one by one in front of the class and recite it in English."
Hoa's the first one to walk up and put her homework on the teacher's desk, and the other students do the same. Tin has just joined our school, and he also hands in his homework. Miss My Lai looks on, twice glancing towards me, but I remain sitting. I've missed handing in three homework assignments so far this year. But I have a good memory and always do well with reciting and saying out loud my homework.
I've finished reciting my improvised essay on the Battle of Saigon, and the whole class claps loudly.
Miss My Lai claps fast, a broad smile on her face. "Cool speech! Now answer the question. When the cows are not roaming freely on Hamburger Hill, where do they go?"
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I'm stumped by the unexpected question. How do I know where the cows go? I don't remember Miss My Lai saying anything on this subject in class. I recall the part about Lieutenant General Melvin Stilwell ordering a bulldozer delivered by air to Hamburger Hill, and then having a crater dug with the bulldozer, to expose the VCs living in the underground tunnels. Hamburger Hill lies in the Cu Chi district, and many tunnels are dug under its ground. I can only guess the answer. "The cows go into the Cu Chi tunnels."
Miss My Lai is so delighted that she jiggles her feet while clapping. "Yes, they go into the tunnels through the camouflaged swing doors set in the rocks."
Tin says, "How does Miss My Lai know this? After Mai and Hoa had paid ransom money to the VCs, they released me by letting me go through a swing door in the rocks."
I glance down at Miss My Lai's feet. Good thing she's not wearing tire sandals.
Miss My Lai grins. "Mai recited an eloquent speech and gave the correct answer. I give Mai 98 out of 100 points, with two points short for not handling the written essay.
Tin has finished reciting his essay, and Miss My Lai gives him 100 points without asking him any questions. After Hoa is done reciting the essay, she stands, waiting.
Miss My Lai smiles. "In the Battle of Saigon, the VCs were trying to ambush the American soldiers from under the ground surrounding the Skyscraper Tree. The VCs gave candies to kids and told them to point the American soldiers to go toward the tree so that the VCs could attack the American soldiers. But why did the VCs lose the battle?"
Hoa says, "The kids had accepted fresher candies from the American soldiers and taken their side. The kids tied ropes to the tree branches, and they told the American soldiers to climb onto the tree by way of the ropes. After waiting for a long time, the VCs came out of the ground and moved to the tree. The American soldiers jumped down from the tree and attacked the VCs."
Miss My Lai nods. "The VCs ran away to a swamp full of alligators, but they had to cross the swamp to escape. There were star fruit trees going all the way across the swamp. The VCs feared getting eaten alive by the alligators, so they surrendered. What could they possibly have done to escape across the swamp?"
Hoa is stuck by this question.
I raise my hand, saying, "I will answer the question if I am allowed to."
Miss My Lai nods, saying, "Go ahead and answer the question, Mai."
I smile. "They could climb up the star fruit trees and move across them, to get to the other end of the swamp and escape from there, hoping the branches wouldn't snap."
Tin looks at me. "But that would still put the VCs at risk of falling to the alligators. It would be safer for the VCs to go through the swing doors set in the rocks, to get into the Cu Chi tunnels, which are everywhere."
Miss My Lai looks at Tin with her eyes wide open and her mouth dropped. "Wow, children, you all gave good answers. I give Mai 99 points, Hoa 100, and Tin 101 points."