CHAPTER XVI.

The day following that upon which Puffeigh left his ship Captain Woodward mustered his crew and made them the following speech:—"My men, I yesterday read my commission and took charge of this ship as your commander. I did not care to address you then; but as I always like to start fairly with my crew, I take this opportunity to do so. I find you are lax in your duty, and that there is a common use of profane language among you which I wish stopped. I may as well tell you that I am in every way averse to flogging. I consider you are men, and that the lash is degrading and brutal. I am determined you shall have your rights, but you must always endeavour to be worthy of them. I wish you to understand that you start fairly with me. I do not know any of your former good or bad behaviour. What a man is to-day is my guide; and those who have been astray have now an opportunity of taking their place, without reproach, with those men who have behaved well. You who are petty officers will, I know, for the sake of your manhood, cease to use those foolish, meaningless oaths and childishly absurd expressions,—cease from this hour, not to please me alone, but out of respect for yourselves. Remember, you have to set an example to your shipmates, and I shall disrate any petty officer who continues to make a fool of himself in that manner. And you able and ordinary seamen, remember you are men, and do not, when addressing each other, use expressions that you would not address to me. Boys, think how much better you are when you speak decently, and how low and degrading you appear in every one's eyes when you forget to do so, and bring yourselves to a level with the vilest outcasts. I don't expect you will leave off all of a sudden. Don't commence by making yourselves ridiculous in attempting the use of fine words, for that would be childish, but try your best to drop so foolish a habit as that of swearing, and when rid of it, never take to it again. Let all remember you have your rights as men, and that no one is justified in abusing you or treating you otherwise than as reasonable beings. Serve your country, and endeavour to do it well, and you will be treated fairly and justly. I don't want the cat-of-nine-tails to assist me in keeping order in the ship. You shall have six months to break yourselves of your foolish habit of swearing, and after that time I shall punish all who indulge in it. All I want is promptness and attention to duty on your part, and for you to take pride in yourselves and your beautiful ship. I don't wish to curry favour with you,—you will find I am strict in all my ideas, but I think a good deal of a sailor who is honest and true, and who knows if he does his duty he has nothing to fear. Be respectful to your officers, and try to elevate yourselves, remembering there's a clear stage and no favour."

This speech was received by the crew with a murmur of applause. Clare, or rather those like him, but more fortunate in having hitherto escaped the lash, rejoiced, as they saw a bright prospect before them, and a chance of getting justice, and all felt delighted when they found their new captain was one of the few officers who did not believe in flogging his men. When they were dismissed after his speech, they sat about the forecastle in groups, and chatted over what he had said.

[Pg 118]

"It's all very well for him to blarney us over like that, but see if he don't have some on us to the gratings afore the six months are up. He ain't agoin' to kid me in that way," observed one of Crushe's pets.

"Who asks you to be kidded, as you calls it?" replied a petty officer who had overheard the foregoing speech. "I tell you what it is, if I hears any swearing in my mess from you, or any other idiot, out you goes; so stow it. I don't think the captain expects we're going to pull long faces, or sing psalms all day; but I for one mean to drop such language, anyhow, and I'd advise you to do so too."

The boys, who were naturally more impressionable than their seniors, did their best to avoid using bad expressions, and it was most amusing to hear the way they would interrupt themselves when having an altercation with each other. Of course there were some who kept on for a time, but, finding the majority of their shipmates regarded their language as mere idle vapouring, they gradually left it off. The great secret of Captain Woodward's success was, that he never himself used an improper expression when addressing his men, or in fact at any other time; he was truly a manly fellow, and before he had been in command six months, any of the Stingers would have gone through fire and water to show their appreciation of his kindness. Those men whom he found unfitted for the positions to which they had been promoted by Crushe he quietly disrated and exchanged into other ships, thus sparing them disgrace before their old shipmates. He went upon the principle that his men were entitled to as much consideration as his officers, never forgetting, however, the respect due to the latter, but rather increasing their individual authority in the eyes of the crew.

Captain Woodward was of middle height, with strongly-knit frame and massive head surrounded by thick curly hair. His eyes were large and piercing, and few men could stand their searching glance. Honest, frank, and affable, he endeavoured to raise to his own level all those with whom he came in contact, but it was delightful to see him put down a bully. No matter how savage the fellow was, he left his presence tamed. The boys would watch his movements and anticipate his orders, quite proud to be able to serve him; and the men found that if they behaved themselves properly, their complaints, when they had any, were attended to; but woe betide the growler or tale-bearer who dared take up the captain's time.

One morning, about three bells, the ship being at that time cruising along the coast, in search of any pirate craft which might be "seeking whom it might devour," the captain was chatting with the first lieutenant, when the latter directed the boatswain's mate of the watch to go below and lash up his hammock, in order to give him an opportunity of getting his nautical bed on deck at the same time as the rest of the crew. The man, whose name was Blain, and who was commonly known by the sobriquet of Mary or Polly Blain, had not been below many moments before the sensitive ears of the commander were shocked by a string of the most horrid imprecations, evidently proceeding from the mouth of the before-mentioned Blain. Lieutenant Russell was about to order the man upon deck, when the commander desired him to let him be for a moment, and then a rough voice was heard in reply to that of the boatswain's mate. Words ran high, and were soon followed by blows, but after they had fought a couple of rounds, the sergeant of marines, who was turned out by the noise, parted them, and ordered both the combatants upon deck.

Mr. Blain was the first to make his appearance up the hatchway, and as he held his nose with one hand, and balanced a hammock upon his shoulder with the other while he came along the deck, he presented such a ludicrous appearance that Captain Woodward could scarce refrain from smiling. Having deposited his bed in the netting, he[Pg 119] walked aft upon the quarter-deck, and stood at attention, but still kept his hand to his nose.

"Why do you apply your hand to the most prominent member of your countenance?" demanded the polite first lieutenant.

"I'm fraidse my nosh will fall offsh," snuffled the man.

Shortly after this his opponent was marched aft, holding his jaws with both hands, like a person suffering from neuralgia. The sergeant of marines, who was a very smart and effective officer, made them stand as nearly at attention as circumstances permitted, and then reported them to the first lieutenant, who, after a casual glance, remarked, "that never, during the entire course of a varied and somewhat peripatetic career, had it been his destiny to find brought before him individuals so totally deprived of the slightest vestiges of intelligence;" and having thus delivered himself, reported the offenders to his superior officer.

As Captain Paul Woodward imagined neither of the men would like to acknowledge having used the very shocking expressions he had overheard them indulge in during the heat of their argument, he was desirous of hearing the case himself, instead of the preliminary inquiries being made by the first lieutenant, and he anticipated some amusement from the proceeding; as old sailors will invent the most astounding stories in order to explain away their faults. Assuming a severe expression of countenance, the commander advanced to where the men stood; upon which Blain pulled his forelock with one hand, and held his nose with the other, while his opponent cautiously removed his right hand from his jaw, saluted, and then clapped it back in its place, as if fearing to leave it for one moment unsupported.

"What are these men's names?"

"Thomas Blain, boatswain's mate, and James Spry, quarter-master, reported for fighting upon the lower deck," observed the sergeant with a military salute.

"State your charge, sergeant."

With another flourish, and drawing himself up to his full height, until he looked like a human tower, the soldier stared straight before him, and thus delivered himself:—"At five minutes to three bells I was aroused by the noise of quarrelling and swearing, and turning over in my hammock, beheld Thomas Blain, boatswain's mate of the watch on deck, bumping James Spry, quarter-master, who was turned in, in his hammock. James Spry looked over his hammock, and observed to Thomas Blain in anything but elegant or refined language, that he was not a gentleman, and he had never thought much of him, or any member of his family. Upon this Thomas Blain called James Spry all the vulgar titles in his biography, and then James Spry jumped out of his hammock, and struck Thomas Blain, upon which a fight ensued; and I got up, put on my uniform, and took them in custody. At that time Thomas Blain had James Spry upon his back, and was endeavouring to bump his jaws against the shot in the rack, upon which James Spry seized a vinegar breaker, and struck Thomas Blain across the nose, nearly extricating it from his visage."

"Is that all, sergeant?"

The soldier saluted by way of confirmation.

Turning to Blain, the commander asked him what he had to say in defence of this charge. Holding his nose with one hand, and with the other pointed towards his enemy, he snuffled out as follows:

"Your honour, I'm as innicent as a babe unborn as to them insinuwations of the sergeant's; however he ken go to say I swore I keant think. I was ordered to go below by the fust lieutenant to lash up my 'ammick, and I vos a passin' by that of Chuckle's, as[Pg 120] ve allways call Jemmy Spry, ven he looks over the edge ov his 'ammick, and ses he to me, he ses, 'You miserabull old ay-nay-tommy,' ses he just in that aggrewating tone; 'you old feg-end, you somethink old sneak,' ses he, 'what are you a skulkin' below in your watch on deck for?' Ses I, 'If you please,' werry civil, yer honour, 'Chuckles, old man, don't use sich langwage to a old shipmate, and swearing, too, ven you knows as how the capting don't hold with no sich,' ses I. Vith that he ups and jumps out of his 'ammick; and after having used verds vich my mouth couldn't be pelluted to go for to repeat, he calls me a old chiser, and said he'd be somethinked if he wouldn't give me toko for yam, and ups and hits me."

"Did you not abuse him in return, my man?"

"Me, sir? me allow sich language to come from my lips? vy, I'd die first. I ses to him, gently and mildly, like I'm speaking now, 'Chuckles,' ses I, 'I'm grieved to the heart to hear a first class petty officer agoing on in that ere pellucid manner.'"

"Then you deny having used improper language?"

"I'll take my oath I never said D. once, sir. Well, your honour, he being no hand with his fists, I soon got him down, upon vich he seized the winnegar breaker, and after using some most horrible language, vich made my teeth stand on edge, he hove it across my mug, and cut my nose nearly off."

"Very good, my man. Now let me hear your version, quarter-master."

Mr. Spry spoke somewhat indistinctly, as he persisted in supporting his jaws with both hands, but Captain Woodward made out the following:—"Yer honour, I was a laying in my hammock a sleepin' like a infant, when all of a sudden I felt a wiolent pain jest here" (here the speaker let go his right jaw, and having indicated the small of his back as the spot where he felt the pain, he took a fresh grip of his chin, and proceeded with his story). "Well, yer honour, the collusion woke me up, and I peeped over the edge of my hammock, where I saw Polly Blain a standin' on a attitude of defiance and a grinnin' at me like a Cheshire cat. Ses I, 'Wot's that for?' Ses he, 'You in-fer-nal old dot,' ses he, 'come out if you are a man.' Upon which I politely said, 'If you please, Thomas Blain, don't be so wery aggrewatin', or I shall be forced to inform the first lieutenant;' upon which he up and said, 'The first lieutenant be jiggered, and he didn't care a dot for him,' etceterur. Upon which I closed my ears, not being given to bad language myself."

"Do you mean to say you did not swear, as he asserts?"

"Sir,—Captain Woodward I'd scorn to tell a lie; and since that ere beautiful speech of yourn I've made a wow never to swear again. No, sir, I'm reformed—I used to swear a little when the last captain was in the ship, but I'm a altered man now, sir. Well, sir, I argyfied with him, civil and peaceful, for a few moments, and then he struck me and threw me down, and jammed my jaws agin the shot-rack, knocking out over fifty teeth, vich he forced me to svaller, as he wouldn't give me time to gasp. Just as he lifted me for the tenth time to heave me upon the shot-rack, my right hand finger somehow slid inside the handle of the winnegar-breaker, and afore I could prevent him, Thomas Blain run his nose clean up agin the breaker and nearly cut it off; upon which he became furious, and would not listen to reason, so I was obliged to repeat the blow in self-defence, as he swore he'd murder me if he could only get at me."

"Is that all?"

"Yes, your honour,—that's all."

Woodward surveyed the men for some moments, then addressed them as follows:—"My men, I am sorry to see you in this plight, and still more, to hear you spin such yarns. I overheard your quarrel, and was disgusted with your obscenity. You, Blain, used language unbecoming a petty officer, and for that I disrate you to be an able [Pg 121]seaman. You, Spry, who are old enough to know better, I also disrate; and as I do not consider either of you fit to associate with the decent men of my crew, I direct you shall leave your messes, and be messed together until such time as you are able to agree, and have left off using profane language. Sergeant, send for the ship's steward."

In a few moments Mr. Polson came up from his bread-room, winking and blinking like an owl in the light.

"Steward, to what messes do these men belong?"

"Let me see, sir. Spry belongs to number two mess, and Blain belongs to number seven."

"Very good. How many messes are there?"

"Twelve seamen's, and four Rile marines' messes, sir."

"Can you make a seventeenth mess?"

"Yes, sir. That is if they mess before the armourer's bench on the supernumerary mess table."

"Very well, steward, enter number seventeen mess in your books, and put down in it these two men's names. Mind, no one else is to join them."

The commander then turned to the sergeant and directed him "to see that the two able seamen took their mess traps and gear into their new mess, and ordered him on no account to allow either of them to take a meal at any but that table," and dismissed the mutilated ones to the comforts of each other's society.

At that moment the pipe went for the cooks of messes to lay aft for their flour and plums.

Spry and Blain were somewhat non-plussed, as each had sworn never to speak to the other when not on duty. They, however, walked forward, when a bright thought occurred to the former, and he motioned his new messmate to toss for the cookship. Blain gravely drew a penny from a small bag in which he kept his money, and twirling the coin in the air, held it hidden between his flattened palms before the face of his opponent. Spry being unable to cry head or tail, looked solemnly and pointed to his own head, upon which Blain removed his uppermost hand disclosed the coin, which was head up. Blain thereupon took a tin dish and drew the rations, after which they sat down to breakfast, back to back. As their meal consisted of cocoa and dry biscuit, there was no need for either to request the other "to pass the sauce," and as far as the actual requirements of the case were concerned they got on very well upon the silent system. After breakfast Spry went on deck, leaving his messmate to make the duff and otherwise prepare their dinner. At twelve o'clock both men sat down and devoured their meal in silence; and when the pipe went for grog, the cook of the mess proceeded on deck to draw their allowance, which having tilted into a basin, he, being without a measure, grimly pushed over to his companion. Now, when two sailors face each other over a bowl of grog they are very apt to forget all differences; and the maimed ones, after pushing the basin backwards and forwards between them, as neither would so far lower himself in the other's eyes as to drink first, at last ventured to exchange glances. There was the grog—strong, dark, and tempting, so they took first a look at that and then at each other, then their hands slowly crept across the table, and there was another friendly contest who should be most polite in silently insisting upon the other taking the first sip. At length they spoke simultaneously.

"Spry, old ship, I'm a fool."

"Blain, old man, I'm a duffer."

And then they drank alternately to each other's health, and swore perpetual friendship.

[Pg 122]

"You see, Jemmy, old man—"

"Call me Chuckles, Polly, it sounds friendlyer like."

"Vell, Chuckles, old man, you don't know how sorry I vos to assault you as I did. However, we're both the better for it."

How Mr. Blain drew this induction we cannot understand, but from that hour they became fast friends and left off swearing. If either of them were very much tried, as was sometimes the case, it would be noticed that his mouth would move in a peculiar manner, which might have been taken for wordless or pantomimic "cussing," but when interrogated upon this point, the old fellows would solemnly deny that their lips had moved to form anything but silent prayers. Some months after they were re-rated petty officers, and it was amusing to see how fearfully shocked they would try to appear whenever they heard any one use strong language; and to such a degree of godliness did old Spry arrive, that upon one occasion he reported a shipmate for calling him an "old damper," and it was with great difficulty that the first lieutenant brought him to understand that it was a term of derision, not an oath.

"It sounded werry much like a D. to me, sir."

"My worthy man, I regret to be compelled to observe that if the gross ignorance under which you labour renders you incompetent to seize the signification of the expression damper; and causes you to contemplate it as a profane expression, you must continue to retain your erroneous impression, as the most elaborate explanation and analysis of the term would be lost in the cimmerian gloom which overspreads your benighted intelligence."

Spry bowed reverently, and turned away quite overcome by the lieutenant's speech, as he observed to his chum Blain, "Not werry well able to make out if the lieutenant were not a cussing of him in Chinee," as Russell was one of the few officers who could speak that language.

Although the Stingers were a reformed crew in many respects, yet they were not a dull one, as their captain and officers encouraged them in getting up amusements of every kind. They felt they were men, and did their best to show their appreciation of their commander's kindness. Of course there were many rough characters among them, but they were kept within bounds by the better class of men. Clare was more reconciled to his fate than ever he had been, but the lash had done its work with him, and no one would have recognized the handsome Tom Clare of former times, in the quiet, gloomy-looking sailor who moved among his fellows like an automaton. One day Captain Woodward sent for the man and offered him a rate, but Tom respectfully declined the honour.

"Why not? take it, my good man."

"It's too late, sir; too late."

"Come, come, my friend, don't look back upon the past. I hear you have been in trouble. You must forget your punishment, as you have done your weakness. You have overcome one, now conquer the other."

"Overcome what, sir?"

"Well, Lieutenant Crushe informed me that you had been brought to the gratings through drink."

"Now, God forgive him for that shocking falsehood. No, sir, I was once strong, hearty, and always as anxious to do my duty as I am now. I was unfortunate enough to offend Lieutenant Crushe when I served under him in the Porpoise. Well, sir, to make a long story short, when I joined the ship I found him in command, and he stopped my leave, and threatened to flog me. Heaven knows, I tried hard enough to please him, but it weren't no use. He worried and hounded me until I deserted."

[Pg 123]

"That was very, very wrong on your part, my man."

"I know it, sir; but I had just been married to as good a girl as ever a man was blessed with, when I found myself ordered to this ship, and when here, a prisoner by his orders. So arter I had in vain appealed to Captain Puffeigh, and had tried every way to get leave, I deserted, and were arrested the same day by a corporal, who grossly insulted my wife, for which I struck him. I were brought on board and reported to Mr. Cravan, who was the officer of the watch, and he, too, called my poor girl foul names, and I struck him. I know that was wrong, but I could not help it. No man would ha' stood by and heard her whom he loved spoken of as he did of my wife. Then they all swore agin me at the court-martial, and I was tried, condemned, and received fifty lashes, while my wife was a fainting in a boat alongside. I wern't allowed to see her, and now I believe she is dead!"

"Come, my friend, you must not despair. I will do my best for you, and you will yet lift up your head if you try."

"Thank ye, sir, you're werry good; but your great kindness can't take the disgrace away from me, or the scars off my back, and, worse 'an all, can't bring my wife back to life."

"How do you know she's dead? Have you positive information?"

"Yes, sir; on the 16th of August I seed her spirit, and she smiled mournful like upon me, and then faded away."

"Your visions are but part of your present state of ill-health, my man, and next mail will probably bring you news from her. Meanwhile, as we shall be in Hong-Kong to-morrow, I'll rate you my coxswain, and give you plenty to employ your mind, and divert you from your morbid ideas."

Tom thanked the commander, and walked forward to prepare his clothes for his new duties, while Woodward sent for the surgeon, and told him of Clare's illusion.

"Its a sad story, Captain Woodward, but unfortunately true. Crushe did as he says, and also exercised great cruelty to others; but we cannot bring odium upon the service by exposing him."

"What do you consider is the matter with this man Clare?"

"Heart disease, brought on through the severe flogging he received. He is a highly sensitive man, and the disgrace and separation from his wife—who is, by-the-by, a very superior woman—are slowly killing him. You have done a very humane act in making him your coxswain, and the change of life may be the means of arresting his malady."

Woodward and the doctor walked out about the quarter-deck arm-in-arm, and chatted upon various subjects until lunch-time, when they went below, and the commander pressed the surgeon to join him. During the time Puffeigh was in command great coolness had existed between the captain and senior surgeon, as the former would often direct the latter to put men off the sick-list, when he did not consider they ought to be under treatment. As the surgeon knew full well that the men in question required rest and medical attention, he always vehemently protested against such arbitrary measures, and had many altercations with Puffeigh upon that subject. The doctor argued: "If a man is sick on shore he is sent to the hospital, and no civil power ever thinks of compelling the surgeons to turn the man out and send him to work; therefore, as a professional man, I will never, to please any captain, put a man off the sick-list who ought to be under medical treatment. I know I am under the command of the captain, but I do not consider that his position entitles him to direct a qualified surgeon how to treat his patients. I am not desirous of opposing the lawful authority of the[Pg 124] commander; but I do not, will not, and never shall acknowledge his right to dictate to me in matters relating to my own department, or influence my professional opinion."

The Stinger arrived at Hong-Kong the next day, and Clare was despatched to the Post-office for the mails. Tom anxiously eyed the bags as he hastened on board with them, hoping for the best, yet fearing there would be a letter for him, containing the sad news of his wife's death; but to his joy, he received several letters, and one dated "16th August," from which he learnt that his wife was alive, yet did not give him any particulars as to her state of health. However, they were full of long accounts about his boy; and in one of them was a portrait painted by the good young lady who had been engaged to Lieutenant Ford. Tom improved from that day, and ventured to tell the captain that his words had come true. Woodward was delighted to see the melancholy face become animated and knowing one of his class had oppressed the man, he felt doubly pleased to be the means of giving the poor fellow hope in the future.

Mr. Shever considered himself an ill-used individual, and would bore the carpenter and gunner with long-winded accounts of his former greatness. Of course he was very circumspect in his behaviour, knowing he would be turned out of the ship if the captain knew of his previous conduct towards the men. Finding it would not do to swear, he became very pious, and under the ministry of Silas Bowler, a converted Royal Marine, was, as the latter gentleman expressed it, "gathered to the flock." It was truly a wonderful alteration, and one calculated to give his shipmates disgust for the particular faith to which the boatswain was a convert. Like most illiterate persons, he took to the musical portion of his belief, and would sit and sing hymns for hours together, much to the disgust of the midshipmen, whose mess-room adjoined his cabin; and it was not an uncommon occurrence to have the warrant-officer and Silas Bowler howling a portion of hymn No. 31, Utah edition, which ran thus:—
"Oh! how delightful 'tis to see
A sinner turned to saint,"

while the irreverent middies would drown the hymn of praise by singing,
"Oh! how disgusting 'tis to see
Our boatswain turning saint."

Whereupon Shever would cease his howl, and pour forth a jargon of hard words and impious phrases, during the delivery of which the mischievous wags in the gun-room would groan and ejaculate after the manner of the particular saints of whom Mr. Bowler was a shining light. The boatswain imagined by these means to attract the attention of his commander or first lieutenant, but he was undeceived when the former told him "that he did not wish his ship turned into a conventicle," and the latter reprimanded him as follows:—

"I would be most loath to incur the accusation of insensibility to the sublime chords of sacred melody, but must formally state, as my candid opinion, that the howls which issue from your cabin strike my auricular nerves in a manner diametrically opposed to the suggestion of aught celestial, and produce an effect the reverse of enchanting. With regard to your supplications to heaven, I would strongly suggest the propriety of their being made in a less audible manner, as it is beyond the bounds of possibility for me to surrender myself to the soothing influence of somnolence during the performance of your orations."
 
Upon receiving this rebuke, Mr. Shever proceeded to his cabin, where he found private Silas Bowler, seated upon his easy chair, quietly enjoying a nap. Without a word of explanation, he seized that pious marine, hauled him into the steerage, shook him until he awoke, then with a well-directed kick sent him flying forward, where that meek individual fell upon his knees and prayed, "that the devil might be cast out of that good man, the boatswain." Having vented his rage upon the soldier, Shever took out a bottle, filled a glass with rum, and drank the health of Captain Crushe, "and may all such duffers as some people perish," and from that day shunned the spirit of faith according to private Silas Bowler, and clave only to that more potent spirit yclept rum.