Just like anywhere you lived, rich folks were just as rich as the poor were poor. Estates were gated and walled off, with buildings in competition with each over which was taller and whose garden was greener. People with no better way to flaunt their money wear it on their skin in the form of vibrant textiles and gaudy jewelry. Upturned noses got me wanting to smash their faces in and decorate their clothes with a nosebleed.
Fu'in was an elevated district at the northeastern section of Taiq'ae, overlooking the rest of the city. The tallest building was only a fifth of the size of Bishamonten's pagoda. It was no mystery that the people here tried to imitate their ruler, and evident in the indulgent streets polished to a gleam, statues of gods and fountains at every intersection, and the jewel-encrusted plating of roof tiles that were miserable to look at.
"Oooh. Pretty!" Yui had her face plastered against the storefront of a bakery, staring at the masterfully crafted decoration of goods. A pair of elven customers inside grimaced at her like they saw an insect land on the window. Just looking at them made me want to wipe the look off their faces.
"So, what are we doing up here? Trying to shake some saps down for information?" Anya asked just as the chime of the storebell alerted us to Yui racing into the bakery.
I kept my eyes peeled for anyone staring at us. "S'bout it. Before Bishamonten gave me an ass-whooping, she said something about castrating a bunch of eunuchs. I ain't seen a single eunuch in the pagoda when I visited her. Which means…"
"If they're living anywhere, it's up here. I get it. You think they kidnapped the emperor kid out of revenge," she said.
There was probably more to it than that, but I got nothing for now. Ain't no one that could come and leave that tower as they pleased without already knowing the ins and outs.
It put a shit taste in my mouth helping Bishamonten, but I gotta swallow it for my own good.
The window to the bakery shattered, and one of the elves flew out into the streets next to our feet. Anya and I turned our heads in time to see Yui walk out the door, dragging the other elf and eating a pastry with jelly slipping off the end of it.
"What? They called me urchin. It's not my fault my nunchuck came to life on its own," she said, her face a mess from the purple jelly.
"Come here, kiddo. You got some on your cheeks." Anya pulled a handkerchief from the elf at our feet and went to wipe Yui's face.
I picked him up by the collar. Poor guy was groaning in pain and had lost a couple of teeth. I felt a little bad. But if he had gotten this exorbitantly rich, he must have deserved it at some point.
"I'm looking for some people. You better have an answer if you know what's good for you," I said, slapping him to consciousness. The man wakes with a start. I stuffed Sacchan into his mouth before he could start screaming. "When I pull this out, you don't want it to go back in a second time. Capiche?"
He nodded so hard his silken blue scarf unraveled from his neck.
"Alright, Mr. Punchable-Face, do you know any eunuchs who used to serve the emperor?" I asked.
"I… I don't…" he said.
"Oh. Is that so? Too bad." I raised my bat.
"WAIT, WAIT! But I know someone who does! I can tell you a place…" he put his arms up like they were going to stop what's coming.
I pushed him forward. "Good. Start walking."
"Huh…?"
Plenty of times I'd been tricked before. Go to this place, go to that place, they'd say. I wasn't going to have any of that. This way, either we're led to what we're looking for, or we get to beat our frustration away with a good wailing.
A lot of people gave us dirty looks. Our appearance didn't exactly scream that we belonged here, and shoving an injured citizen of the city around was a sure way to attract attention. Luckily, most people here were reserved and not looking for trouble. They turned a blind eye despite our glorified tour guide throwing begging glances for help.
The way his eyes darted and head fidgeted looked like he considered taking off running. He was probably searching for a chance to escape. Not that he'd get very far.
"Here… here it is…" the elf said.
We stood in front of a manor, modest in comparison to the rest of the buildings in Fu'in. No gate or walls, but the door was crafted with the bearded face of a familiar god. A heavy ring served as the knock.
The elf tried to tiptoe away, but Anya grabbed him by the scruff of his neck. "You ain't going anywhere yet."
I knocked hard. No one answered, but I heard shuffling from the other side. The door opened a crack. A squirrely-looking man with a monocle stared hard at the four of us. Then slammed the door shut.
"The fucker slammed the door on us." I clicked my tongue.
"I'll get him!" Yui blew open the door with her nunchuck, breaking it off the hinges. She disappeared inside and returned a moment later with the monocled man in tow.
We tossed him into the middle of the street.
"Take your pants off," Anya said.
"W-What did I do?" he asked, choking back a whimper.
I bashed Sacchan against the side of the elf's head, knocking him unconscious in front of the old man.
"You heard her," I said.
The man took his clothes off in the middle of the streets. Our bullying was beginning to attract a lot more attention than before.
"What gives? He's got his testes. Thought the guys we're looking for didn't have their cojones?" Yui asked.
"I'm not a eunuch… I only served them as a mere chamberlain in the pagoda!" he said as he wept.
Well, shit.
I was about to hit the elf again but realized he was unconscious.
"You're a lot closer to the mark than that guy on the ground. Those guys you served kidnapped the emperor. Tell me where they're hiding or you're headed for an early grave," I threatened.
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"I tried to dissuade, but they wouldn't listen— Hoomei and Yunjin are the masterminds. They… They wanted to teach the empress a lesson after what she did to them," he said.
Figured as much. Castrating a bunch of eunuchs who were in power and leaving them alive was a mistake. Of course they were going to get back at Bishamonten. That bitch was so used to being in power she let herself get blinded by her own overconfidence.
Maybe we weren't so different.
"If you know where they are, you better tell us now. We been running around the city this whole time and getting real angry," Yui said.
"But—" The guy wanted to refuse. There was a hint of fear in his voice, but not of us.
As it turned out, the kidnappers of Emperor Yonnu were not in the Fu'in district. They were there earlier, but left some time around noon. The big surprise was that we were led to underneath the emperor's pagoda, right under Bishamonten's nose.
The underground chambers once served as barracks long since abandoned, but maintained their larger armory chambers that housed a lack of weapons, armors, and equipment that Cynderace had plenty of. It seemed this was why Jinwa needed to maintain a good relationship with Scoth to be provided arms.
In which case, were the eunuchs trying to undermine that alliance?
We reached the end of the hall that opened into a massive chamber. Three incredibly large statues were carved into the walls to appear as if they were holding up the ceiling, which I assumed was right underneath the pagoda. Furniture was haphazardly piled together and pushed up against the statues' feet.
Our coming here didn't go unnoticed.
Twenty eunuchs in total, beastlings and humans alike, one of them held Yonnu with a knife pressed to his neck. Behind them was a strange magical device. A life-sized crystal floated in place, with iron bands going around it like on a barrel.
"Where's our invitation to the party?" I asked.
One of them was especially angry. "Kimo, you sold us out—"
"Uh-uh. Don't look at him. Look at us. Hand the kid over, and I'll make sure you get away with a bit of amnesia," I said.
"Don't step any closer…! The device behind us is rigged to explode. The whole tower will come crumbling down, along with that bitch!" another shouted.
"What device? This one?" Yui had picked up the large crystal and zoomed back to us in an instant.
It whirred to life and glowed bright. The disgraced eunuchs squealed, thinking it was going to explode. Most I could sense out of this didn't seem to be a lot of magic. Sure it could cave the underground in, but the three of us would get out unhurt. Emperor Yonnu, on the other hand…
"Wait a minute… Yui, if you were able to grab this so fast, why didn't you grab the emperor instead?" I asked her.
She was dumbstruck. "Oh, haha! But this thing looked a lot more fun! I could fetch him if ya want."
The next moment, Yonnu was right next to us and being cradled in Yui's arms. The lizard beastling who was just holding Yonnu now only held the paper wrapping from the pastry Yui ate earlier.
"Then how do we diffuse this?" Anya asked, tapping the crystal.
"There is no diffusing! The empress ruined our lives. We'll take everything from her in return!" one of the eunuchs shouted.
I wound Sacchan up to hit the bomb, but Anya and Yui both clutched onto my bat to stop me.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa! You're just going to hit it?" Yui cried.
"You got any better ideas?" I asked.
"I dunno. Maybe not hitting the bomb," Anya said.
"Fine." I put my bat down, but as soon as they let go, I swung hard and impacted the crystal with a sickening crack.
Everyone in the chamber dropped to the ground. Yui threw herself on top of Yonnu. But nothing happened. Instead of exploding, the crystal shattered into a hundred smaller shards.
Anya clocked me over the head. "You idiot."
"What was that for? I diffused it!" I said, rubbing the back of my head.
It was either we did something or let it go boom. The eunuchs were still on the ground, eyes screwed shut and clutching her heads, waiting for the explosion.
"You wanna take 'em? Or should I?" I asked Anya.
"Nah. She's got it." Anya thumbed behind us.
"Kaoru!" Yonnu broke free from Yui's grasp and raced into the arms of Bishamonten, who was just now entering the chamber.
If I'd ever seen a resting bitch face break character, there it was. The delinquent yakuza, known for her cold persona and ruthlessness, was shedding tears as she wrapped her arms around the emperor. She hugged him so tight, I thought she'd squeeze the life out of him.
"Please, don't ever leave my sight again," Bishamonten said through quivering lips.
"Shotac—" Yui was about to say something to ruin the moment, but Anya acted fast enough to shut her mouth.
Bishamonten's gaze fell on the three of us. I didn't expect any word of thanks, and she wasn't expecting to give any either. Instead, she ushered Yonnu back to us and turned her eyes on the traitors.
"Empress Kaoru, wait— it wasn't our idea!" The whole crew of eunuchs groveled on the ground, the terror palpable even from here.
"Be quiet." Bishamonten went god-mode and summoned Kamigoroshi.