"Don't want anybody to get scared. Sit down, Guilford, and you, too, Hanna, (nodding at Old Miss). Ah, and this is the one you call Bob? All right, got no objections to that, either. Dropped my baggage out there on the porch. Have someone take it up. Not now, plenty of time. Don't want anybody to get scared; I'm not a pauper. Shall insist upon paying my way. Here, girl, bring another plate; I'm as hungry as a prairie wolf. Look here! (and now he turned to me). Don't want you to call me master. Won't have it; call me Mr. Clem. Long time since I went away, but nothing has changed. Hurry up, there, with that plate. Confound it, don't be put out so, everybody. How are you getting along, Guilford?"
All this was rattled off before anyone else had a chance to say a word. Old Master was glad to see him and the tears ran down his wrinkled cheeks. He tried to tell him much but could tell him nothing except that he was welcome to make his home there.
"What's board worth?" Mr. Clem asked, and Old[Pg 112] Master cried out, "Good Lord! Did I ever hear anything like that? Clem, is it possible that you—"
"Mean to pay my board as long as I stay here. You'll have to take the money, Hanna. If you don't agree, I'll grab my saddle-bags and put out. I'm from a place where every man is expected to pay his way. Wish you'd all quit your everlasting sniffling. What are you doing, Bob?" Old Master was now helping his plate. "Another slab of that meat, Guilford. What are you doing, young feller?"
"Preparing myself for the law," Young Master answered proudly.
"All right, no particular harm in it. Good job for a lazy man. Hanna, you hold your own pretty well. Not as old as I expected to find you; and Guilford is a marvel of youthfulness. Don't know how I happened to come back—Just took the notion one night and I was on the road before daylight the next morning. That's the way we do things in Illinois. Pass me some more of that egg-bread. Hanged, if that ain't Kentucky up and down. Old aristocracy still on its mouldering throne, eh? Good thing for some people while it lasts, but it will tumble over pretty soon."
"Clem, you musn't talk that way," Old Miss interposed.
[Pg 113]
"All right, I'll shut it off; thousands of things to talk about. What's board worth in this neighborhood?"
"Clem," said Old Master, leaning upon the table and looking at him, "I don't know that I ever heard of a gentleman paying board in this neighborhood."
"Hah! By the hoofs, I never heard of a gentleman refusing to pay board in any neighborhood," Mr. Clem replied. "Come, how much am I expected to pay? Can't get board here, board somewhere else."
"Oh, that would be a scandal," Old Miss cried.
"Then let us avoid scandal. Find out what is customary and let me know. Guilford, devilish glad to see you. Wish I had come before. Bob, got a horse you want to trade for a better one? I've got a nag out there that's a beauty. Let's go and look at him?" he added, throwing down his knife and fork and shoving his chair back.
"Not now, uncle Clem," the young man replied, laughing.
"Uncle! That's good—like to hear it; gives me a sort of anchor. I think you and I will get along all right. Guilford told me, I don't know how long ago—got the letter somewhere—that it was your ambition to become an orator. And I can give you a few points, for I have lived for years in a hot bed of free speech,[Pg 114] and without free speech, there is no real oratory. Round here they think that Marshall and Clay were great orators, and they were in a way, but you ought to hear Abe Lincoln."
"I never heard of him," Old Master spoke up.
"Oh, no; but you will. He can squeeze mirth and tears out of the heart all at once. When he arises to speak, and even before he has uttered a word, every man in the audience says to himself, 'there is my brother.' Guilford, your polished Kentuckians speak out of the book, by note, and they may work themselves into a fine heat, but this man Lincoln cries from the fullness of a soul that the Lord has given him."
"Clem," said Old Master, bending a hard look upon his brother and rolling his pill of bread, "you tempt me to say that you are a blasphemer against the majestic voice of my State, sir. Never was the voice of man truer than among these graceful hills, and never did the heart of man beat warmer for freedom and justice."
"Ah," Mr. Clem cried, "for freedom, did you say? For slavery, you mean."
"Sir," said Old Master, "Henry Clay has spoken for the bondman."
[Pg 115]
"But was he honored for it?" Mr. Clem asked. "Do you honor him for it?"
"Clem, if you have come to sow the seeds of abolition, to disgrace my household with the mud brought from your free soil—your sink hole of iniquity—I must request you to go away."
"It is easier to drop a subject than to ride a long distance," Mr. Clem replied with a broad smile. "Got any good horses?"
"Horses native to this land and therefore the best," said Old Master.
"Got one you can't manage? If you have, I'll make him get down on his knees and beg for mercy."
Old Master looked at Bob and laughed. "We've got a great black horse we call Zeb, and our sick quarter is sometimes filled with his victims. Dan here, can break almost any piece of horse-flesh, but he's afraid of Zeb. The negroes don't call him Zeb—they call him the Devil, sir."
"And I would advise you not to have anything to do with him, Uncle Clem," said Young Master. "He cut a great gash on Andrew's head, broke Tony's arm not long ago, and laid Dan up for a week. We keep him merely for show, for he is the most graceful thing you ever saw."
[Pg 116]
"And I will drive him to town this morning," Mr. Clem declared. And getting up, he added: "Come, show him to me?"
We could but laugh at the self-confidence shown by this rugged man from the West; we felt that he had brought with him the breezy brag so characteristic of his boundless territory. But I felt a pinch of regret, for I had conceived a liking for the man and did not wish to see him humbled.
"Come on," said Old Master, leading the way, but Old Miss interposed. "You must not go near that vicious creature," she said to Mr. Clem. "Nothing would delight him more than to plant a hoof between your eyes, and I declare, General, it's a shame that you encourage such a thing."
"Come out and take a drive with me," Mr. Clem cried, gently putting Old Miss out of the way. But she shuddered at the thought and closed the door upon us as we passed out. "In one respect I am not a true Kentuckian," said my Young Master to Mr. Clem as we walked along toward the stable. "I could never find it in my heart to worship a horse."
Mr. Clem stepped in front of the young man, halted and looked at him and then at Old Master. [Pg 117]"Guilford," said he, "can it be possible that this is your son?"
"Wait until you see the Devil, and you will deny that you are my brother," Old Master laughed, rubbing his thin hands in a sort of mischievous glee. Bob took Mr. Clem by the arm and as they walked along I heard him say: "If I had known you, I should have wished for your coming. There is something so unexpected about you that I must call you the new man—you are the very opposite of the books I have been reading."
"Yes, Bub, I am the opposite of all your teaching."
"I don't know that I like the word Bub."
"But you'll have to stand it; I'm going to pay my way, and the world, the flesh and the devil are willing to put up with much from that sort of a man."
We had now come to the stable. Through a small window we saw the fiery horse's black eyes shining. "Bring him out," Mr. Clem commanded.
"That is easy enough," Old Master replied. "It is only when you attempt to put leather on him that he shows his mettle."
"Bring him out," said Mr. Clem. "Here, boy, bring me a bridle and a set of buggy harness."
There was a great commotion in the barn-yard, and the negroes went running to and fro, amid whisperings[Pg 118] and the suppressed excitement of expected sport. The horse was led out by the halter, a picture of devilish majesty, head high in contempt, nostrils broad, eyes afire. The harness lay in a heap upon the ground. Mr. Clem took up the bridle. In an instant the horse had jerked the halter from the negro's grasp, was standing almost erect on his hind feet, and he came toward Mr. Clem, cutting the air with his fore hoofs. The rest of us fell back, one over the other, but Mr. Clem did not move. Old Master shouted at him, but paying no heed he stood, with his eyes fixed upon the advancing beast. I was off to one side and could see his face, hard-set and with steady eyes. "Ho!" he said, low in his breast, and the horse's feet fell to the ground. I don't think I ever saw so complete a picture of astonishment. The horse, cowed by that one low word, stood there trembling, with the coming sweat glistening upon his flanks. Mr. Clem stepped forward and touched his neck and he squatted and trembled. A loud murmur arose among the negroes. The Devil had been conquered with a word. He took the bit and suffered the harness to be put upon him; he was put between the shafts and with but one protest he was driven about the grounds. That one protest was a convulsive kick. Mr. Clem got out of the buggy,[Pg 119] walked round, caught him in the nostrils, and with a violent torsion cried, "Ho!"
That was a great day on the plantation, and before nightfall the news had spread about the neighborhood, and at evening a number of people came to welcome Mr. Clem's return to the home of his youth. The degree of fawning shown on that occasion was of great amusement to my Young Master, for he knew that had his uncle come back a great scholar, an authority upon some scientific discovery, he would have been suffered to poke about almost unobserved; but appearing as the conqueror of a vicious horse, he laid a strong hold upon the admiration of his fellows.