PATRICIA HAD HER ARMS around Ben Caxton and gave him the all-outkiss of brotherhood before he knew what hit him. She felt at once his uneaseand was herself surprised, because Michael had told her to expect him, givenher Ben’s face in her mind, had explained that Ben was a brother in allfullness, of the Inner Nest, and she knew that Jill was growncloser with Bensecond only to that with Michael . . . which was always necessarily first sinceMichael was the fountain and source of all their knowledge of the water oflife.
But the foundation of Patricia’s nature was an endless wish to make otherpeople as happy as she was; she slowed down. She invited Ben to get rid ofhis clothes but did so casually and did not press the matter, except to askhim to remove his shoes, with the explanation that the Nest was everywherekind to bare feet and the unstated corollary that street shoes would not bekind to it-it was soft and clean as only Michael’s powers could keep thingsclean, which Ben could see for himself.
Aside from that she merely pointed out where to hang any clothes he foundtoo warm for the Nest and hurried away to fetch him a drink. She didn’t askhis preferences; she knew them from Jill. She merely decided that he wouldchoose a double martini this time rather than Scotch and soda, the poor dearlooked tired. When she came back with a drink for each of them, Ben wasbarefooted and had removed his street jacket. .Brother, may you neverthirst.“.We share water,“ he agreed and drank. .But there’s mighty little water inthat.“.Enough,“ she answered. .Michael says that the water could be completely inthe thought; it is the sharing. I grok he speaks rightly.“.I grok. And it’s just what I needed. Thanks, Patty.“.Ours is yours and you are ours. We’re glad you’re safely home. Just now theothers are all at services or teaching. But there’s no hurry; they will comewhen waiting is filled. Would you like to look around your Nest?“Still puzzled but interested Ben let her lead him on a guided tour. Some partsof it were commonplace: a huge kitchen with a bar at one end-rather short ongadgets and having the same kind-to-the-feet floor covering as elsewhere,but not notable otherwise save for size-a library even more loaded thanJubal’s, bathrooms ample and luxurious, bedrooms- Ben decided that theymust be bedrooms although they contained no beds but simply floors thatwere even softer than elsewhere; Patty called them .little nests“ and showedhim one she said she usually slept in.
It contained her snakes.
It had been fitted on one side for the comfort of snakes. Ben suppressed hisown slight queasiness about snakes until he came to the cobras. .It’s allright,“ she assured him. .We did have glass in front of them. But Michael hastaught them that they must not come past this line.“.I think I would rather trust glass.“.Okay, Ben.“ In remarkably short order she replaced the glass barrier, frontand top. But he was relieved when they left, even though he managed tostroke Honey Bun when invited to. Before returning to the huge living roomPat showed him one other room. It was large, circular, had a floor whichseemed almost as cushiony as that of the bedrooms, and no furniture. In itscenter was a round pool of water, almost a swimming pool. .This,“ she toldhim, .is the Innermost Temple, where we receive new brothers into the Nest.“She went over and dabbled a foot in the water. .Just right,“ she said. .Wantto share water and grow closer? Or maybe just swim?“.Uh, not right now.“.Waiting is,“ she agreed. They returned to the living room and Patricia wentto get him another drink. Ben settled himself on a big, very comfortablecouch-then got up at once. The place was too warm for him, that first drinkwas making him sweat, and leaning back on a couch that adjusted itself toowell to his contours made him just that much hotter. He decided it was damnsilly to dress the way he would in Washington, warm as it was in here-andwith Patty decked out in nothing but ink and a bull snake she had left aroundher shoulders during the latter part of the tour that reptile would keep himfrom temptation even if it wasn’t already clearly evident that Patty was nottrying to be provocative.
He compromised by leaving on jockey shorts and hung his other clothes inthe foyer. As he did so, he noticed a sign printed on the inside of the doorthrough which he had entered: .Did You Remember to Dress?“He decided that, in this odd household, this gentle warning might benecessary if any were absent-minded. Then he saw something else that hehad missed on coming in, his attention earlier having been seized by thesight of Patty herself. On each side of the door was a large bowl, as gross asa bushel basket-and each was tilled with money.
More than filled- Federation notes of various denominations spilled out onthe floor.
He was staring at this improbability when Patricia returned. .Here’s yourdrink, Brother Ben. Grow close in Happiness.“.Uh, thanks.“ His eyes returned to the money.
She followed his glance. .You must think I’m a sloppy housekeeper, Ben-andI am. Michael makes it so easy, most of the cleaning and such, that I forget“She squatted down, retrieved the money, stuffed it into the less crowdedbowl.
.Patty, why in the world?“.Oh. We keep it here because this door leads out to the street. Just forconvenience. If one of us is leaving the Nest-and I do, myself, almost everyday for grocery shopping-we are likely to need money. So we keep it whereyou won’t forget to take some with you.“.You mean ... just grab a handful and go?“.Why, of course, dear. Oh, I see what you mean. But there is never anyonehere but us. No visitors, ever. If any of us have friends outside- and, ofcourse, all of us do-there are plenty of nice rooms lower down, the ordinarySort that outsiders are used to, where we can visit with them. This moneyisn’t where it can tempt a weak person.“.Huh! I’m pretty weak, myself!“She chuckled gently at his joke. .How can it tempt you when it’s alreadyyours? You’re part of the Nest.“.Uh ... I suppose so. But don’t you worry about burglars?“ He was trying toguess how much money one of those bowls contained. Most of the notesseemed to be larger than singles-hell, he could see one with three zeroes onit still on the floor, where Patty had missed it in her tidying up.
.One did get in, just last week.“.So? How much did he steal?“.Oh, he didn’t. Michael sent him away.“.Called the cops?“.Oh, no, no- Michael would never turn anybody over to the cops. I grok thatwould be a wrongness Michael just-. She shrugged. .-made him go away.
Then Duke fixed the hole in the skylight in the garden room-did I show youthat? It’s lovely ... a grass floor. But I remember that you have a grass floor,Jill told me. That’s where Michael first saw one. Is it grass all over? Everyroom?“.Just my living room.“.If I ever get to Washington, can I walk on it? Lie down on it? Please?“.Of course, Patty. Uh, ..it’s yours.“.I know, dear. But it’s not in the Nest, and Michael has taught us that it isgood to ask, even when we know the answer is yes. I’ll lie on it and feel thegrass against me and be filled with Happiness to be in my brother’s .littlenest.’
.You’ll be most welcome, Patty.“ Ben reminded himself sharply that he didn’tgive a hoot in hell what his neighbors thought-but he hoped she would leaveher snakes behind. .When will you be there?“.I don’t know. When waiting is filled. Maybe Michael knows.“.Well, warn me if you can, so I’ll be in town. If not, Jill always knows the codefor my door-I change it occasionally. Patty, doesn’t anybody keep track of thismoney?“.What for, Ben?“.Uh, people usually do.“.Well, we don’t. Just help yourself as you go out-then put back any you haveleft when you conic home, if you remember to. Michael told rue to keep thegrouch bag filled. If it runs low I get some more from him.“Ben dropped the matter, stonkered by the simplicity of the arrangement. Healready had some idea, from Mike and second-hand from Jill and Jubal, ofthe moneyless communism of the Martian culture; he could see that Mikehad set up an enclave of it here-and these bowls of cash marked thetransition point whereby one passed from Martian to Terran economy. Hewondered if Patty knew that it was a fake . . - bolstered up by Mike’senormous fortune. He decided not to ask.
.Patty, how many are there in the Nest?“ He felt a mild worry that he wasacquiring too many sharing brothers without his consent, then shoved backthe thought as unwOrthy after all, why would any of them want to sponge onhim? Other than, possibly to lie on his grass rug~-he didn’t have any pots ofgold just inside his door.
.Let me see ... there are almost twenty now, ~ountiflg novitiate brothers whodon’t really think in Martial) yet and aren’t ordained.“.Are you ordained, Patty?“.Oh, yes. But mostly I teach. Beginners’ classes in Martian, and I helpnovitiate brothers and such. And Dawn and I-Dawn and Jill are each HighPriestes -Dawn and I are pretty well-known Fosterites, especially Dawn, sowe work together to show other FosteriteS that the Church of All Worldsdoesn’t conflict with the Faith, any more than being a Bapfist keeps a manfrom joining the Masons.“ She showed Ben Foster’s kiss, explained what itmeant, and showed him also its miraculous companion placed by Mike.
.They all know what Foster’s kiss means and how hard it is to win it and bythen they’ve seen some of Mike’s miracles and they are just about ripe tobuckle down and sweat to climb into a higher circle.“.It’s an effort?“.Of course it is, Ben-for them. In your case and mine, and Jill’s, and a fewothers-YOU know them all-Michael called us straight into brotherhood. But toothers Michael first teaches a discipline-not a faith but a way to realize faith inworks. And that means they’ve got to start by learning Martian. That’s noteasy; I’m not perfect in it myself. But it is much Happiness to work and learn.
You asked about the size of the Nest-let me see, Duke and Jim and Michaeland myself-two Fosterites, Dawn and myself . . . one circumcised Jew andhis wife and four children-.
.Kids in the Nest?“.Oh, more than a dozen. Not here, but in the nestlings’ nest just off of here;nobody could meditate with kids hooting and hollering and raising Ned, Wantto see it?“.Uh, later.“.One Catholic couple with a baby boy-excommunicated I’m sorry to say; theirpriest found out about it. Michael had to give them very special help; it was anasty shock to them-and so utterly unnecessary. They were getting up earlyevery Sunday morning to go to mass just as usual-but kids will talk. OneMormon family of the new schism-that’s three more, and their kids. The restare the usual run of Protestants and one atheist . . . that is, he thought hewas an atheist, until Michael opened his eyes. He came here to scoff; hestayed to learn . . - and he’ll be a priest before long. Uh, nineteen grown-ups-I’m pretty sure that’s right though it’s hard to say, since we’re hardly ever allin the Nest at once, except for our own services in the Innermost Temple.
The Nest is built to hold eighty-one-that’s .three-filled,’ or three times threemultiplied by itself-but Michael says that there will be much waiting beforewe’d need a bigger nest and by then we will be building other nests. Ben?
Wouldn’t you like to see an outer service, see how Michael makes the pitch,instead of just listening to me ramble on? Michael will be preaching just aboutnow.“.Why, yes, if it’s not too much trouble.“.You could go by yourself. But I’d like to go with you ... and I’m not busy. Justa see, dearie, while I get decent.“.Jubal, she was back in a couple of minutes in a robe not unlike Anne’sWitness robe but cut differently, with angel-wing sleeves and a high neck andthe trademark Mike uses for the Church of All Worlds-nine concentric circlesand a conventionalized Sun-embroidered over her heart. This getup was apriestess robe, her vestments; Jill and the other priestesses wear the samesort, except that Patty’s was opaque, a heavy synthetic silk, and came sohigh that it covered her cartoons, and was caught at both wrists for the samereason. She had put on stockings, too, or maybe bobby socks, and wascarrying sandals.
.Changed the hell out of her, Jubal. It gave her great dignity. Her face is quitenice and I could see that she was considerably older than I had first guessedher although not within twenty years of what she claims to be. She has anexquisite complexion and I thought what a shame it was that anyone hadever touched a tattooing needle to such skin.
.I had dressed again. She asked me to take off just my shoes because weweren’t going out the way I had come in. She led me back through the Nestand out into a corridor; we stopped to put on shoes and went down a rampthat wound down maybe a couple of floors until we reached a gallery. It wassort of a loge overlooking the main auditorium. Mike was holding forth on theplatform. No pulpit, no altar, just a lecture hall, with a big All-Worlds symbolon the wall behind him. There was a robed priestess on the platform with himand, at that distance, I thought it was Jill- but it wasn’t; it was another womanwho looks a bit like her and is almost as beautiful. The other high priestess,Dawn-Dawn Ardent.“.What was that name?“ Jubal interrupted.
.Dawn Ardent-née Higgins, if you want to be fussy.“.I’ve met her.“.I know you have, you allegedly retired goat. She’s got a crush on you...“Jubal shook his head. .Some mistake. The .Dawn Ardent’ I mean I just barelymet, about two years ago. She wouldn’t even remember me.“.She remembers you. She gets every one of your pieces of commercial crud,on tape, under every pseudonym she has been able to track down. She goesto sleep by them, usually, and they give her beautiful dreams. She says.
Furthermore there is no doubt that she knows who you are. Jubal, that bigliving room, the Nest proper, has exactly one item of ornamentation, if you’llpardon the word-a life-sized color so11y of your head. Looks as if you hadbeen decapitated, with your face in a hideous grin. A candid shot that Dukesneaked of you, I understand.“.Why, that brat!“.Jill asked him to, behind your back.“.Double brat!“.Sir, you are speaking of the woman I love-although I’m not alone in thatdistinction. But Mike put her up to it. Brace yourself, Jubal-you are the patronsaint of the Church of All Worlds.“Jubal looked horrified. .They can’t do this to me!“.They already have. But don’t worry; it’s unofficial and not publicized. ButMike freely gives you credit, inside the Nest just among water brothers, forhaving instigated the whole show and explained things to him so well that hewas finally able to figure out how to put over Martian theology to humans.“Jubal looked about to retch. Ben went on, .I’m afraid you can’t duck it. But inaddition, Dawn thinks you’re beautiful. Aside from that quirk, she is anintelligent woman-and utterly charming. But I digress. Mike spotted us atonce, waved and called out, .Hi, Ben! Later’-and went on with his spiel.
.Jubal, I’m not going to try to quote him, you’ll just have to hear it. He didn’tsound preachy and he didn’t wear robes-just a smart, welltailored, whitesyntholinen suit. He sounded like a damned good car salesman, except thatthere was no doubt he was talking about religion. He cracked jokes and toldparables-none of them straitlaced but nothing really dirty, either. The essenceof it was a sort of pantheism . . . one of his parables was the oldy about theearthworm burrowing along through the soil who encounters anotherearthworm and at once says, .Oh, you’re beautiful! You’re lovelyl Will youmarry me?’ and is answered: .Don’t be silly! I’m your other end.’ You’veheard it before?“.’Heard it?’ I wrote it!“.I hadn’t realized it was that old. Anyhow, Mike made good use of it. His ideais that whenever you encounter any other grokking thing-he didn’t say.grokking’ at this stage-any other living thing, man, woman, or stray cat . . .
you are simply encountering your .other end’ . . . and the universe is just alittle thing we whipped up among us the other night for our entertainment andthen agreed to forget the gag. He put it in a much more sugar-coated fashion,being extremely careful not to tread on competitors’ toes.“Jubal nodded and looked sour. .Solipsism and Pantheism. Teamed togetherthey can explain anything. Cancel out any inconvenient fact, reconcile alltheories, and include any facts or delusions you care to name. Trouble is, it’sjust cotton candy, all taste and no substance-and as unsatisfactory as solvinga story by saying: .-and then the little boy fell out of bed and woke up; it wasjust a dream.’“.Don’t crab at me about it; take it up with Mike. But believe me, he made itsound convincing. Once he stopped and said, .You must be tired of so muchtalk-. and they yelled back, .No!’-I tell you, he really had them. But heprotested that his voice was tired and, anyhow, a church ought to havemiracles and this was a church, even though it didn’t have a mortgage.
.Dawn, fetch me my miracle box.’ Then he did some really amazing sleightof-hand. Did you know he had been a magician with a carnival?“.I knew he had been with it. He never told me the exact nature of hisshame.“.He’s a crackerjack magician; he did stunts for them that had me fooled. Butit wouldn’t have mattered if it had been only the card tricks kids learn; it washis patter that had them rolling in the aisles. Finally he stopped and saidapologeticallY~ .The Man from Mars is supposed to be able to do wonderfulthings . . . so I have to pass a few miracles each meeting. I can’t help beingthe Man from Mars; it’s just something that happened to me. But miraclescan happen for you, too, if you want them. However, to be allowed to seeanything more than these narrow-gauge miracles, you must enter the Circle.
Those of you who truly want to learn I will see later. Cards are being passedaround,’
.Patty explained to me what Mike was really doing. .This crowd is just marks,dear-people who come out of curiosity or maybe have been shined in bysome of our own people who have reached one of the inner circles.’ Jubal,Mike has the thing rigged in nine circles, like degrees in a lodge-and nobodyis told that there actually is a circle farther in until they’re ready to be inductedinto it. .This is just Michael’s bally,’ Pat told me, .which he does as easy as hebreathes-while all the time he’s feeling them out, sizing them up, gettinginside their heads and deciding which ones are even possible. Maybe one inten. That’s why he strings it out- Duke is up behind that grille and Michaeltells him every mark who just might measure up, where he sits andeverything. Michael’s about to turn this tip . . . and spill the ones he doesn’twant. Dawn will handle that part, after she gets the seating diagram fromDuke.’“.How did they work that?“ asked Harshaw.
.I didn’t see it, Jubal. Does it matter? There are a dozen ways they could cutfrom the herd the ones they wanted as long as Mike knew which they wereand bad worked out some way to signal Duke. I don’t know. Patty says he’sclairvoyant and says it with a straight face-and, do you know, I won’t discountthe possibility. But right after that, they took the collection. Mike didn’t doeven this in church style-you know, soft music and dignified ushers. He saidnobody would believe that this was a church service if be didn’t take acollection . . . so he would, but with a difference. Either take it or put it-suityourself. Then, so help me, they passed collection baskets already loadedwith money. Mike kept telling them that this was what the last crowd had left,so help themselves . . . if they were broke or hungry and needed it. But if theyfelt like giving . . - give. Share with others. Just do one or the other-putsomething in, or take something out. When I saw it, I figured he had foundone more way to get rid of too much money.“Jubal said thoughtfully, .I’m not sure he would lose by it. That pitch, properlygiven, should result in more people giving more . . . while a few take just alittle. And probably very few. I would say that it would be hard indeed to reachin and take out money when the people on each side of you are puttingmoney in . . unless you need it awfully badly.“.I don’t know, Jubal ... but I understand that they are just as casual aboutthose collections as they are about that stack of dough upstairs. But Pattywhisked me away when Mike turned the service over to his high priestess. Iwas taken to a much smaller auditorium where services were just opening forthe seventh circle in-people who had belonged for several months at leastand had made progress. If it is progress.
.Jubal, Mike had gone straight from one to the other, and I couldn’t adjust tothe change. That outer meeting was half popular lecture and half sheerentertainment-this one was more nearly a voodoo rite. Mike was in robes thistime; he looked taller, ascetic, and intense-! swear his eyes gleamed. Theplace was dimly lighted, there was music that was creepy and yet made youwant to dance. This time Patty and I took a double seat together, a couchthat was darn near a bed. What the service was all about I couldn’t say. Mikewould sing out to them in Martian, they would answer in Martian__-except forchants of .Thou art GodI Thou art God!’ which was always echoed by someMartian word that would make my throat sore to try to pronounce it.“Jubal made a croaking noise. .Was that it?“.Huh? I believe it was-allowing for your horrible tall-corn accent. Jubal . . . areyou hooked? Have you just been stringing me along?“.No. Stinky taught it to me-and he says that it’s heresy of the blackest sort.
By his lights I mean-I couldn’t care less. It’s the Martian word Mike translatesas: .Thou art God.’ But our brother Mahmoud says that isn’t even close tobeing a translation. It’s the universe proclaiming its own self-awareness . . *or it’s .peccavimus’ with a total absence of contrition or a dozen other things,all of which don’t translate it. Stinky says that not only it can’t be translatedbut that he doesn’t really understand it in Martian-except that it is a bad word,the worst possible in his opinion and much closer to Satan’s defiance than itis to the blessing of a benevolent God. Go on. Was that all there was to it?
Just a bunch of fanatics yelling Martian at each other?“.Uh ... Jubal, they didn’t yell and it wasn’t fanatical. Sometimes they wouldbarely whisper, the room almost dead quiet. Then it might climb in volume alittle but not much. They did it in sort of a rhythm, a pattern, like a cantata, asif they had rehearsed it a long time . . . and yet it didn’t feel as if they hadrehearsed it; it felt more as if they were all just one person, humming tohimself whatever he felt at the moment. Jubal, you’ve seen how theFosterites get themselves worked up-.
.Too much of it, I’m sorry to say.“.Well, this was not that sort of frenzy at all; this was quiet and easy, likedropping off to sleep. It was intense all right and got steadily more so, but-Jubal, ever sit in on a spiritualist séance?“.I have. I’ve tried everything I could, Ben.“.Then you know how the tension can grow without anybody moving or sayinga word. This was much more like that than it was like a shouting revival, oreven the most sedate church service. But it wasn’t mild; it packed terrificwallop.“.The technical word is .Apollonian.’“.Huh?“.As opposed to .Dionysian.’ And both rather Procrustean I’m sorry to say.
People tend to simplify .Apollonian’ into .mild,’ and .calm,’ and .cool.’ But.Apollonian’ and .Dionysian’ are two sides of the same coin-a nun on herknees in her cell, holding perfectly still and her facial muscles relaxed, can bein a religious ecstasy more frenzied than any priestess of Pan Priapuscelebrating the vernal equinox. Ecstasy is in the skull, not in the setting-upexercises.“ Jubal frowned. .Another common error is to identify .Apollonian’
with .good’-merely because our most respectable sects are all ratherApollonian in ritual and precept. Mere local prejudice. Proceed.“.Well ... things weren’t as quiet as a nun at her devotions anyhow. Theydidn’t just stay seated and let Mike entertain them. They wandered about abit, swapped seats, and there was no doubt that there was necking going on;no more than necking, I believe, but the lighting was very low key and it washard to see from one pew to another. One gal wandered over our way,started to join us, but Patty gave her some sign to let us be so she just kissedus and left.“ Ben grinned. .Kissed quite well, too, though she didn’t dailyabout it. I was the only person not dressed in a robe; I was as conspicuousas a space suit in a salon. But she gave no sign of noticing.
.The whole thing was very casual ... and yet it seemed as coordinated as aballerina’s muscles. Mike kept busy, sometimes out in front, sometimeswandering among the others-once he squeezed my shoulder and kissedPatty, unhurriedly but quickly. He didn’t speak to me. Back of the spot wherehe stood when he seemed to be leading them was some sort of a dingus likea magic mirror, or possibly a big stereo tank; he used it for .miracles,’ only atthis stage he never used the word-at least not in English. Jubal, every churchpromises miracles. But it’s always jam yesterday and jam tomorrow, neverjam today.“.Exception,“ Jubal interrupted again. .Many of them deliver as a matter ofroutine-exempli gratia among many: Christian Scientists and RomanCatholics.“.Catholics? You mean Lourdes?“.The example included Lourdes, for what it may be worth. But I referred tothe Miracle of Transubstantiation, called forth by every Catholic priest at leastdaily.“.Hmm- Well, I can’t judge that subtle a miracle. To a heathen outsider likemyself that sort of miracle is impossible to test. As for Christian Scientists, Iwon’t argue-but if I break a leg, I want a sawbones.“.Then watch where you put your feet,“ Jubal growled. .Don’t bother mewith your fractures.“.Wouldn’t think of it. I want one who wasn’t a classmate of WilliamHarvey.“.Harvey could reduce a fracture. Proceed.“.Yeah, but how about his classmates? Jubal, those things you cited asmiracles may be such-but Mike offers splashy ones, ones the cashcustomers can see. He’s either an expert illusionist, one who would make thefabled Houdini look clumsy ... or an amazing hypnotist-.
.He might be both.“.-or he’s smoothed the bugs out of closed-circuit stereovision to the pointwhere it simply cannot be told from reality, for his special effects. Or .I’vebeen .ad fer a button, dearie.’“.How can you rule out real miracles, Ben?“.I included them with the button. It’s not a theory I like to think about.
Whatever he used, it was good theater. Once the lights came up behind himand here was a black~mafled lion, lying as stately and sedately as if guardinglibrary steps, while a couple of little lambs wobbled around him. The lion justblinked and yawned. Sure, Hollywood can tape that sort of special effect anyday-but it looked real, so much so that I thought I smelled the lion . . . and ofcourse that can be faked, too.“.Why do you insist on fakery?“.Damn it, I’m trying to be judicial!“.Then don’t lean over backwards so far you fall down. Try to emulateAnne.“.I’m not Anne. And I wasn’t very judicial at the time. I just lounged back andenjoyed it, in a warm glow. It didn’t even annOY me that I couldn’tunderstand most of what was said; it felt as if I got the gist of it. Mike did a lotof gang-ho miracles-or illusions. Levitation and such. I wasn’t being critical, Iwas willing to enjoy it as good showmanship Patty slipped away toward theend after whispering to me to stay where I was and she would be back.
.Michael has just told them that any who do not feel ready for the next circleshould now .eave,’ she told me.
.I said, .I guess I had better leave, too.’
.And she said, .Oh, no, dear-You’re already Ninth Circle-Y0U know that. Juststay seated, I’ll be back.’ And she left.
.I don’t think anybody decided to chicken out. This group was not onlySeventh Circle but Seventh Circlers who were all supposed to be promoted.
But I didn’t really notice for the lights came up again . . . and there was Jill!
.Jubal, this time it definitely did not feel like stereoviSiofl. Jill picked me outwith her eyes and smiled at me. Oh, I know, if the person beingphotograPhed looks directly at the cameras, then the eyes meet yours nomatter where you’re seated But if Mike has it smoothed out this well, he hadbetter patent it. Jill was dressed in an outlandish costume-~ priestess outfit, IsuppoSe~ but not like the others. Mike started intoning something to her andto us, partly in English ... stuff about the Mother of All, the unity of many, andstarted calling her by a series of names . . and with each name her costumechanged-.
Ben Caxton came quickly alert when the lights came up behind the HighPriest and he saw Jill Boardmafl posed, above and behind the priest. Heblinked and made sure that he had not again been fooled by lighting anddistance-this was Jill She looked back at him and smiled. He half listened tothe invocation while thinking that he had been convinced that the spacebehind the Man from Mars was surely a stereo tank, or some gitumick. But hecould almost swear that he could walk up those steps and pinch her. He wastempted to do so-then reminded himself that it would be a crummY trick toruin Mike’s show. Wait till it was over and Jill was free- .Cybele!“ -and Jill’scostume suddenly changed-again.Frigg!“.Gel“.Devil“.Ishtar!“.Maryam“.Mother Eve! Mater Deus Magna! Loving and Beloved, Life Undying-.
Caxton stopped hearing the woids . . . for Jill suddenly was Mother Eve,clothed only in her own glory. The light spread and he saw that she wasstanding gently at rest in a Garden, beside a tree around and on which wastwined a great serpent.
Jill smiled at them all, turned a little, reached up and smoothed the serpent’shead turned back and opened her arms to all of them. The first of thecandidates moved forward to enter the Garden. Patty returned and touchedCaxton on the shoulder. .Ben, I’m back. Come with me, dear.“Caxton was reluctant, he wanted to stay and drink in the glorious vision of Jill. . . he wanted to do more than that; he wanted to join that proceSsiOn andgo where she was. But he found himself getting up and leaving with Patricia.
He looked back and saw Mike about to put his arms around and kiss the firstwoman in the line . . . turned to follow Patricia outside and failed to see thecandidates’ robe vanish as Mike kissed her- and did not see what followed atonce, when Jill kissed the first male candidate for elevation to the eighthcircle...and his robe vanished.
.We have to go long way .round,“ Patty explained~ .to give them time to getclear and on into the Temple of the Eighth Circle. Oh, it wouldn’t actually hurtto barge in, but it would waste Michael’s time, getting them back in the mooaandhe does work so very hard.“.Where are we going now?“.To pick up Honey Bun. Then back to the Nest. Unless you want to take partin the initiation to the Eighth Circle. You can, you know, since you’re NinthCircle. But you haven’t learned Martian yet; you’d find it very confusing.“.Well-I’d like to see Jill. When will she be free?“.Oh. She told me to tell you that she was going to duck upstairs and see you.
Down this way, Ben.“A door opened and Ben found himself in the garden he had seeD. Theserpent was still festooned on the tree; she raised her head as they came in.
.There, there, dears“ Patricia said to her. .You were Mama’s good girl,weren’t you?“ She gently unwrapped the boa and flaked it down into abasket, tail first. .Duke brought her down for me but I have to arrange her onthe tree and tell her to stay there and not go wandering off. You were lucky,Ben; a transition service from Seventh to Eighth happens very seldom-Michael won’t hold it until there are enough candidateS ready to build andhold the mood ... although we used to supply people out of the InnermostCircle to help the first candidates from outside through.“Ben carried Honey Bun for Patty until they reached the top level and learnedthat a fourteen-foot snake is quite a load; the basket had steel braces andneeded them. As soon as they were that high, Patricia stopped. .Put herdown, Ben.“ She took off her robe and handed it to him, then go out thesnake and draped it around her. .This is Honey Bun’s reward for being agood girl; she expects to cuddle up to Mama. I’ve got a class starting almostat once, so I’ll walk the rest of the way with her on me and let her stay on meuntil the last possible second. It’s not a goodness to disappoint a snake;they’re just like babies. They can’t grok in fullness, except that Honey Bungroks Mama...and Michael, of course.“They walked the fifty yards or so to the entrance to the Nest proper and at itsdoor Patricia let Ben take off her sandals for her after he removed his shoes,He wondered bow she could balance on one foot under such a load . . . andnoticed, too, that she had gotten rid of her socks or stockings at some point—no doubt while she was out arranging Honey Bun’s stage appearance.
They went inside and she went with him, still clothed in the big snake, whilebe shucked down to his jockey shorts-stalling as he did so, trying to make uphis mind whether to discard the shorts, too. He had seen enough to be fairlycertain that clothing, any clothing, inside the Nest was as unconventional bythese conventions (and possibly as rude), as hob-nailed boots on a dancetloor. The gentle warning on the exit door, the fact that there were nowindows anywhere in the Nest, the womblike comfort of the Nest itself,Patricia’s lack of attire plus the fact that she had suggested (but not insisted)that he do likewise-all added up to an unmistakable pattern of habitualdomestic nudity . . . among people who were all at least nominally his own.water brothers,“ even though he had not met most of them.
He had seen further confirmation in addition to Patricia, whose behavior hehad discounted somewhat from a vague feeling that a tattooed lady mightvery .well have odd habits about clothing. On coming into the living room theyhad passed a man beaded the other way, toward the baths and the .little ~“-and he had worn less than Patricia by one snake and lots of pictures. He hadgreeted them with .Thou art God“ and gone on, apparently as used to buff asPatricia was. But, Ben reminded himself, this .brother“ hadn’t seemedsurprised that Ben was dressed, either.
There had been other such evidence in the living room: a body sprawled facedown on a couch across the room-a woman, Ben thought, although he hadnot wanted to stare after a quick glance had shown him that this one wasnaked, too.
Ben Caxtofl had thought himself to be sophisticated about such things.
Swimming without suits be considered only sensible. He knew that manyfamilies were casually naked in their own homes-and this was a family, ofsorts-although he himself had not been brought up in the custom. He hadeven (once) let a girl invite him to a nudist resort, and it had not troubled himespecially after the first five minutes or so-he had simply regarded it as a sillylot of trouble to go to for the dubiOus pleasures of poison ivy, scratches, andan all-over sunburn that bad put him in bed for a day.
But now he found himself balanced in perfect indecision, unable to make uphis mind between the probable urbanity of removing his symbolic fig leaf . . .
and the even stronger probability-certainty he decided-that if he did so andstrangers came in who were dressed and stayed that way, he would feel allfiredsilly~ Hell, he might even blush!
.What would you have done, Jubal?“ Ben demanded.
Harshaw lifted his eyebrows. .Axe you expecting me to be shocked, Ben? Ihave seen the human body, professionally and otherwise, for most of acentury. It is often pleasing to the eye, frequently most depressiflg and neversignificant per se. Only in the subjective value the viewer places on the sight.
I grok Mike runs his household along nudist lines. Shall I cheer? Or must Icry? Neither. It leaves me unmoved.“.Damn it man!, it’s easy for you to sit there and be Olympian about it-youweren’t faced with the choice. I’ve never seen you take off your pants incompany.“.Nor are you likely to. .Other times, other customs.’ But I grok you were notmotivated by modesty. You were suffering from a morbid fear of appearingridiculous-a well-known phobia with a long, pseudo-Greek name with which Ishall not bore you.“.Nonsense! I simply wasn’t certain what was polite.“.Nonsense to you, sir-YOU already knew what was polite ... but were afraidyou might look silly . . or possibly feared being trapped inadvertently in thegallant reflex. But I seem to grok that Mike had a reason for instituting thishousehold custom-Mike always has reasons for everything he does, althoughsome of them seem strange to me.“.Oh, yes. He has reasons. Jill told me about them.“Ben Caxton was standing in the foyer, his back to the living room and hishands on his shorts, having told himself, not very firmly, to take the plungeand get it over with-when two arms came snugly around his waist frombehind. .Ben darling! How wonderful to have you here!“He turned and had Jill in his arms and her mouth warm and greedy againsthis-and was very glad that he had not quite finished stripping. For she was nolonger .Mother Eve“; she was wearing one of the long, allenvelopingpriestess robes. Nevertheless he was happily aware that he had a doublearmful of live, warm, and gently squirming girl; her priestly vestment was nogreater impediment than would have been a thin gown, and both kinestheticand tactile senses told him that the rest was Jill.
.Golly!“ she said, breaking from the kiss. .I’ve missed you, you old beast.
Thou art God.“.Thou art God,“ he conceded. .Jill, you’re prettier than ever.“.Yes,“ she agreed. .It does that for you. But I can’t tell you what a thrill it gaveme to catch your eye at the blow-off.“.’Blow-off’?“.Jill means,“ Patricia put in, .the end of the service where she is All Mother,Mater Deum Magna. Kids, I must rush.“.Never hurry, Pattycake.“.I gotta rush so I won’t have to hurry. Ben, I must put Honey Bun to bed andgo down and take my class-so kiss me good-night now. Please?“Ben found himself kissing good-night a woman still wrapped most thoroughlyby a giant snake-and decided that he could think of better ways . . . saywearing full armor. But he tried to ignore Honey Bun and treat Patty as shedeserved to be treated.
Jill kissed her and said, .Stop by and tell Mike to stall until I get there,pretty please.“.He will anyhow. .Night, dears.“ She left unhurriedly.
.Ben, isn’t she a lamb?“.She certainly is. Although she had me baffled at first.“.I grok. But it’s not because she’s tattooed nor because of her snakes, Iknow. She baffled you-she baffles everybody-because Patty never has anydoubts; she just automatically always does the right thing. She’s very muchlike Mike. She’s the most advanced of any of us-she ought to be highpriestess. But she won’t take it because her tattoos would make some of theduties difficult-be a distraction at least-and she doesn’t want them taken off.“.How could you possibly take off that much tattooing? With a flensing knife?
It would kill her.“.Not at all, dear. Mike could take them off completely, not leave a trace, andnot even hurt her. Believe me, dear, he could, But he groks that she does notthink of them as belonging to her; she’s just their custodian- and he grokswith her about it. Come sit down. Dawn will be in with supper for all three ofus in a moment-I must eat while we visit or I won’t have a chance untiltomorrow. That’s poor management with all eternity to draw from . . . but Ididn’t know when you would get here and you happen to arrive on a very fullday. But tell me what you think of what you’ve seen? Dawn tells me you sawan outsiders’ service, too.“.Yes.“.Well?“.Mike,“ Caxton said slowly, .has certainly blossomed out. I think he could sellshoes to snakes.“.I’m quite sure he could. But he never would because it would be wrongsnakesdon’t need them. What’s the matter, Ben? I grok there’s somethingbothering you.“.No,“ he answered. .Certainly not anything I can put my finger on. Oh, I’m notmuch for churches ... but I’m not against them exactly- certainly not againstthis one. I guess I just don’t grok it.“.I’ll ask you again in a week or two. There’s no hurry.“.I won’t be here even a week.“.You have some columns on the spike“-it was not a question.
.Three fresh ones. But I shouldn’t stay even that long.“.I think you will ... then you’ll phone in a few . . . probably about the Church.
By then I think you will grok to stay much longer.“.I don’t think so.“.Waiting is, until fullness. You know it’s not a church?“.Well, Patty did say something of the sort.“.Let’s say it’s not a religion. It is a church, in every legal and moral sensesandI suppose our Nest is a monastery. But we’re not trying to bring people toGod; that’s a contradiction in terms, you can’t even say it in Martian. We’renot trying to save souls, because souls can’t be lost. We’re not trying to getpeople to have faith, because what we offer is not faith but truth-truth theycan check; we don’t urge them to believe it. Truth for practical purposes, forhere-and-now, truth as matter of fact as an ironing board and as useful as aloaf of bread . . . so practical that it can make war and hunger and violenceand hate as unnecessary as . . . as-well, as clothes here in the Nest. But theyhave to learn Martian first. That’s the only hitch-finding people who arehonest enough to believe what they see, and then are willing to do the hardwork-it is hard work- of learning the language it can be taught in. A composercouldn’t possibly write down a symphony in English . . and this sort ofsymphony can’t be stated in English any more than Beethoven’s Fifth canbe.“ She smiled. .But Mike never hurries. Day after day he screens hundredsof people finds a few dozen . . . and out of those a very few trickle into theNest and he trains them further. And someday Mike will have some of us sothoroughly trained that we can go out and start other nests, and then it canbegin to snowball. But there’s no hurry. None of us, even us in the Nest, arereally trained. Are we, dear?“Ben looked up, somewhat startled by Jill’s last three words-then was reallystartled to find bending over him to offer him a plate a woman whom hebelatedly recognized as the other high priestess-Dawn, yes, that was right.
His surprise was not reduced by the fact that she was dressed in Patricia’sfashion, minus tattoos.
But Dawn was not startled. She smiled and said, .Your supper, my brotherBen. Thou art God.“.Uh, thou art God. Thanks.“ He was beyond being surprised when sheleaned down and kissed him, then got plates for herself and Jill, sat down onthe other side of him and began to eat. He was willing to concede that, if notGod, Dawn had the best attributes associated with goddesses; he was rathersorry she had not sat down across from him-he couldn’t see her well withoutbeing obvious about it.
.No,“ Dawn agreed, between bites, .we aren’t really trained yet, Jill. Butwaiting will fill.“.That’s the size of it, Ben,“ Jill continued. .For example, I took a break to eat.
But Mike hasn’t had a bite for well over twenty-four hours and won’t eat untilhe’s not needed-you happened to bit a crowded day, because of that groupmaking transition to Eighth Circle. Then when Mike is through, he’ll eat like apig and that will carry him as long as necessary. Besides that, Dawn and Iget tired . . . don’t we, sweet?“.We surely do. But I’m not too tired, Gillian. Let me take this service and youcan visit with Ben. Give me that robe.“.You’re crazy in your little pointy head, my love-and Mama spank. Ben, she’sbeen on duty almost as long as Mike has. We both can take that long astretch-but we eat when we’re hungry and sometimes we need sleep.
Speaking of robes, Dawn, this was the last vanishing robe in the SeventhTemple. I meant to tell Patty she’d better order a gross or two.“.She has.“.I should have known. This one seems a little tight.“ Jill wiggled in it in afashion that disturbed Ben more than Dawn’s perfect and unrobed skin. .Arewe putting on weight, Dawn?“.I think we are, a little. No matter.“.Helps, you mean. We were too skinny. Ben, you noticed, didn’t you, thatDawn and I have the same figure? Height, bust, waist, hips, weight,everything-not to mention coloration. We were almost the same when we met. . . and then, with Mike’s help, we matched up exactly and are holding it thatway. Even our faces are getting more alike-but we didn’t plan that. That justcomes from doing the same things and thinking about the same things. Standup and let Ben look at us, dear.“Dawn put her plate aside and did so, in a pose that reminded Ben oddly ofJill, more so than the figure resemblance seemed to justify; then he realized itwas the exact pose Jill had been in when she had first stood revealed asMother Eve.
Invited to Stare, he did. Jill said, with her mouth full, .See, Ben? That’sme.“Dawn smiled at her. .A razor’s edge of difference, Gillian.“.Pooh. You’re getting that control, too. I’m almost sorry we’ll never have thesame face. It’s very handy, Ben, for Dawn and myself to look so much alike.
We have to have two high priestesses; it’s all two of us can do to keep upwith Mike. We can trade places right in the middle of a service -andsometimes do. And besides,“ she added, swallowing, .Dawn can buy a fitteddress and it fits me, too. Saves me the nuisance of shopping for clothes.
When we wear clothes.“.I wasn’t sure,“ Ben said slowly, .that you still wore clothes at all. Exceptthese priestess things.“Jill looked surprised. .Do you think we would go out dancing in these? Wewear evening dresses, same as everybody else. That’s our favorite way ofnot getting our beauty sleep, isn’t it, dear? Sit back down and finish yoursupper; Ben has stared at us long enough for the moment. Ben, there’s aman in that transition group you were just with who’s a perfectly dreamydancer and this town is loaded with good night clubs-and Dawn and I havekept the poor fellow so busy, alternated keeping him up so many nights in arow, that we’ve had to help him stay awake in language classes. But he’ll beall right; once you reach Eighth Circle you don’t need nearly so much sleep.
Whatever made you think we never dressed, dear?“.Uh-. Ben finally blurted Out the embarrassing predicament he had beenin.
Jill looked wide-eyed, then barely giggled-and stopped it at once, at whichBen realized that he had heard none of these people laugh only the .marks“in the outer service. .I see. But, darling, I just never got around to taking thisrobe off. I am wearing it because I have to gobble and git. But had I grokkedthat that was troubling you, I certainly would have chucked it before I saidhello even though I wasn’t sure there was another one handy. We’re so usedto dressing or not dressing according to what we need to do that I just plainforgot that I might not be behaving politely. Sweetheart, take those shorts offorleave them on, exactly as suits you.“.Uh-.
.Just don’t fret about it, either way.“ Jill smiled and dimpled. .Reminds me ofthe first time Mike tried a public beach, but in reverse. .Member, Dawn?“.I’ll never forget it!“.Ben, you know how Mike is about clothes. He just doesn’t understand them.
Or didn’t. I had to teach him everything. He couldn’t see any point to them asprotection, until he grokked-to his great surprise-that we aren’t asinvulnerable as he is. Modesty-that sort of .modesty’; he’s so modest in itstrue sense that it hurts-body-modesty isn’t a Martian concept, it couldn’t be.
And only lately has Mike grokked clothes as ornaments, after we startedexperimenting with various ways to costume our acts.
.But, Ben, while Mike was always wiJling to do what I told him to, whether hegrokked it or not, you can’t imagine how many million little things there are tobeing a human being. We take twenty or thirty years to learn them; Mike hadto learn them almost overnight. There are gaps, even now. He does thingsnot knowing that isn’t how a human does them. We all teach him-Dawn and Iespecially. All but Patty, who is sure that anything that Michael does must beperfect. But he’s still grokking the nature of clothes. He’s groks mostly thatthey’re a wrongness that keeps people apart-and get in the way of lettinglove cause them to grow closer. Lately he’s come to realize that part of thetime you want and need, such a barrier-with outsiders. But for a long timeMike wore clothes only because I told him to and when I told him he must.
.And I missed a gap.“.We were down in Baja California; it was just at the time we met-or remet,actually-Dawn. Mike and I checked in at night at one of those big fancy beachhotels and he was so anxious to grok the ocean, get wet all over, that he letme sleep the next morning and went down by himself for his first encounterwith the ocean. And I didn’t realize that Mike didn’t know about swim suits.
Oh, he may have seen them . . . but he didn’t know what they were for or hadsome mixed-up idea. He certainly didn’t know that you were supposed towear them in the water-the idea was almost sacrilege. And you know Jubal’srigid rules about keeping his pool clean-I’m sure it’s never seen a suit. I doremember one night a lot of people got tossed in with all their clothes on, butit was when Jubal was going to have it drained right away anyhow.
.Poor Mike! He got down to the beach and threw off his robe and headed forthe water . . . looking like a Greek god and just as unaware of localconventions-and then the riot Started and I came awake fast and grabbedsome clothes myself and got down there just in time to keep him out of jail . .
. and fetched him back to the room and he spent the rest of the day in atrance.“Jill got a momentary faraway look. .And he needs me now, too, so I must runalong. Kiss me good-night, Ben; I’ll see you in the morning.“.You’ll be gone all night?“.Probably. It’s a fairly big transition class and, truthfully, Mike has just beenkeeping them busy the past half hour and more while we visited. But that’s allright.“ She stood up, pulled him gently to his feet and went into his arms.
Presently she broke from the kiss but not from his arms and murmured, .Bendarling, you’ve been taking lessons. Whew!“.Me? I’ve been utterly faithful to you-in my own way.“.In the same way I’ve been to you ... the nicest way. I wasn’t complaining . . .
I just think Dorcas has been helping you to practice kissing.“.Some, maybe. Nosy.“.Uh huh, I’m always nosy. The class can wait while you kiss me once more.
I’ll try to be Dorcas.“.You be yourself.“.I would be, anyway. Self. But Mike says that Dorcas kisses more thoroughly-.groks a kiss more’-than anyone.“.Quit chattering.“She did, for a while, then sighed. .Transition class, here I come- glowing likea lightning bug. Take good care of him, Dawn.“.I will.“.And better kiss him right away and see what I mean!“.I intend to.“.’Bye, darlings! Ben, you be a good boy and do what Dawn tells You.“ Sheleft, not hurrying-but running.
Dawn stood up, flowed up against him, put up her arms.
Jubal cocked an eyebrow. .And now I suppose you are going to tell me thatat that point, you went chicken.“.Uh, not exactly. A near miss, call it. To tell the truth I didn’t have too much tosay about it. I, uh, .cooperated with the inevitable.’“Jubal nodded. .No other possible course. You were trapped and couldn’t run.
Whereupon the best a man can do is try for a negotiated peace.“ He added,.But I’m sorry that the civilized habits of my household caused the boy to fallafoul the law of the jungles of Baja California.“.I don’t think he’s a boy any longer, Jubal.