All that day Don Quixote and Sancho remained in the village and inn waiting for night, the one to finish off his task of scourging in the open country, the other to see it accomplished, for therein lay the accomplishment of his wishes. Meanwhile there arrived at the hostelry a traveller on horseback with three or four servants, one of whom said to him who appeared to be the master, “Here, Senor Don Alvaro Tarfe, your worship may take your siesta to-day; the quarters seem clean and cool.”
When he heard this Don Quixote said to Sancho, “Look here, Sancho; on turning over the leaves of that book of the Second Part of my history I think I came casually upon this name of Don Alvaro Tarfe.”
“Very likely,” said Sancho; “we had better let him dismount, and by-and-by we can ask about it.”
The gentleman dismounted, and the landlady gave him a room on the ground floor opposite Don Quixote’s and adorned with painted serge hangings of the same sort. The newly arrived gentleman put on a summer coat, and coming out to the gateway of the hostelry, which was wide and cool, addressing Don Quixote, who was pacing up and down there, he asked, “In what direction your worship bound, gentle sir?”
“To a village near this which is my own village,” replied Don Quixote; “and your worship, where are you bound for?”
“I am going to Granada, senor,” said the gentleman, “to my own country.”
“And a goodly country,” said Don Quixote; “but will your worship do me the favour of telling me your name, for it strikes me it is of more importance to me to know it than I can tell you.”
“My name is Don Alvaro Tarfe,” replied the traveller.
To which Don Quixote returned, “I have no doubt whatever that your worship is that Don Alvaro Tarfe who appears in print in the Second Part of the history of Don Quixote of La Mancha, lately printed and published by a new author.”
“I am the same,” replied the gentleman; “and that same Don Quixote, the principal personage in the said history, was a very great friend of mine, and it was I who took him away from home, or at least induced him to come to some jousts that were to be held at Saragossa, whither I was going myself; indeed, I showed him many kindnesses, and saved him from having his shoulders touched up by the executioner because of his extreme rashness.”
Tell me, Senor Don Alvaro,” said Don Quixote, “am I at all like that Don Quixote you talk of?”
“No indeed,” replied the traveller, “not a bit.”
“And that Don Quixote — ” said our one, “had he with him a squire called Sancho Panza?”
“He had,” said Don Alvaro; “but though he had the name of being very droll, I never heard him say anything that had any drollery in it.”
“That I can well believe,” said Sancho at this, “for to come out with drolleries is not in everybody’s line; and that Sancho your worship speaks of, gentle sir, must be some great scoundrel, dunderhead, and thief, all in one; for I am the real Sancho Panza, and I have more drolleries than if it rained them; let your worship only try; come along with me for a year or so, and you will find they fall from me at every turn, and so rich and so plentiful that though mostly I don’t know what I am saying I make everybody that hears me laugh. And the real Don Quixote of La Mancha, the famous, the valiant, the wise, the lover, the righter of wrongs, the guardian of minors and orphans, the protector of widows, the killer of damsels, he who has for his sole mistress the peerless Dulcinea del Toboso, is this gentleman before you, my master; all other Don Quixotes and all other Sancho Panzas are dreams and mockeries.”
“By God I believe it,” said Don Alvaro; “for you have uttered more drolleries, my friend, in the few words you have spoken than the other Sancho Panza in all I ever heard from him, and they were not a few. He was more greedy than well-spoken, and more dull than droll; and I am convinced that the enchanters who persecute Don Quixote the Good have been trying to persecute me with Don Quixote the Bad. But I don’t know what to say, for I am ready to swear I left him shut up in the Casa del Nuncio at Toledo, and here another Don Quixote turns up, though a very different one from mine.”
“I don’t know whether I am good,” said Don Quixote, “but I can safely say I am not ‘the Bad;’ and to prove it, let me tell you, Senor Don Alvaro Tarfe, I have never in my life been in Saragossa; so far from that, when it was told me that this imaginary Don Quixote had been present at the jousts in that city, I declined to enter it, in order to drag his falsehood before the face of the world; and so I went on straight to Barcelona, the treasure-house of courtesy, haven of strangers, asylum of the poor, home of the valiant, champion of the wronged, pleasant exchange of firm friendships, and city unrivalled in site and beauty. And though the adventures that befell me there are not by any means matters of enjoyment, but rather of regret, I do not regret them, simply because I have seen it. In a word, Senor Don Alvaro Tarfe, I am Don Quixote of La Mancha, the one that fame speaks of, and not the unlucky one that has attempted to usurp my name and deck himself out in my ideas. I entreat your worship by your devoir as a gentleman to be so good as to make a declaration before the alcalde of this village that you never in all your life saw me until now, and that neither am I the Don Quixote in print in the Second Part, nor this Sancho Panza, my squire, the one your worship knew.”
“That I will do most willingly,” replied Don Alvaro; “though it amazes me to find two Don Quixotes and two Sancho Panzas at once, as much alike in name as they differ in demeanour; and again I say and declare that what I saw I cannot have seen, and that what happened me cannot have happened.”
“No doubt your worship is enchanted, like my lady Dulcinea del Toboso,” said Sancho; “and would to heaven your disenchantment rested on my giving myself another three thousand and odd lashes like what I’m giving myself for her, for I’d lay them on without looking for anything.”
“I don’t understand that about the lashes,” said Don Alvaro. Sancho replied that it was a long story to tell, but he would tell him if they happened to he going the same road.
By this dinner-time arrived, and Don Quixote and Don Alvaro dined together. The alcalde of the village came by chance into the inn together with a notary, and Don Quixote laid a petition before him, showing that it was requisite for his rights that Don Alvaro Tarfe, the gentleman there present, should make a declaration before him that he did not know Don Quixote of La Mancha, also there present, and that he was not the one that was in print in a history entitled “Second Part of Don Quixote of La Mancha, by one Avellaneda of Tordesillas.” The alcalde finally put it in legal form, and the declaration was made with all the formalities required in such cases, at which Don Quixote and Sancho were in high delight, as if a declaration of the sort was of any great importance to them, and as if their words and deeds did not plainly show the difference between the two Don Quixotes and the two Sanchos. Many civilities and offers of service were exchanged by Don Alvaro and Don Quixote, in the course of which the great Manchegan displayed such good taste that he disabused Don Alvaro of the error he was under; and he, on his part, felt convinced he must have been enchanted, now that he had been brought in contact with two such opposite Don Quixotes.
Evening came, they set out from the village, and after about half a league two roads branched off, one leading to Don Quixote’s village, the other the road Don Alvaro was to follow. In this short interval Don Quixote told him of his unfortunate defeat, and of Dulcinea’s enchantment and the remedy, all which threw Don Alvaro into fresh amazement, and embracing Don Quixote and Sancho he went his way, and Don Quixote went his. That night he passed among trees again in order to give Sancho an opportunity of working out his penance, which he did in the same fashion as the night before, at the expense of the bark of the beech trees much more than of his back, of which he took such good care that the lashes would not have knocked off a fly had there been one there. The duped Don Quixote did not miss a single stroke of the count, and he found that together with those of the night before they made up three thousand and twenty-nine. The sun apparently had got up early to witness the sacrifice, and with his light they resumed their journey, discussing the deception practised on Don Alvaro, and saying how well done it was to have taken his declaration before a magistrate in such an unimpeachable form. That day and night they travelled on, nor did anything worth mention happen them, unless it was that in the course of the night Sancho finished off his task, whereat Don Quixote was beyond measure joyful. He watched for daylight, to see if along the road he should fall in with his already disenchanted lady Dulcinea; and as he pursued his journey there was no woman he met that he did not go up to, to see if she was Dulcinea del Toboso, as he held it absolutely certain that Merlin’s promises could not lie. Full of these thoughts and anxieties, they ascended a rising ground wherefrom they descried their own village, at the sight of which Sancho fell on his knees exclaiming, “Open thine eyes, longed-for home, and see how thy son Sancho Panza comes back to thee, if not very rich, very well whipped! Open thine arms and receive, too, thy son Don Quixote, who, if he comes vanquishe by the arm of another, comes victor over himself, which, as he himself has told me, is the greatest victory anyone can desire. I’m bringing back money, for if I was well whipped, I went mounted like a gentleman.”
“Have done with these fooleries,” said Don Quixote; “let us push on straight and get to our own place, where we will give free range to our fancies, and settle our plans for our future pastoral life.”
With this they descended the slope and directed their steps to their village.
唐吉诃德和桑乔那天在客店里等待天黑。他们一个想在野外把自己那顿鞭子打完，另一个想看看打完之后，自己的愿望是否能够实现。这时，一个骑马的客人带着三四个佣人来到了客店。一个佣人向那个看样子是主人的人说道：
“阿尔瓦罗·塔费大人，您可以先在这儿睡个午觉，这个客店既干净又凉快。”
唐吉诃德听到此话，对桑乔说道：
“你看，桑乔，我随手翻阅那本写我的小说下卷时，常见到这个阿尔瓦罗·塔费的名字。”
“那很可能，”桑乔说，“咱们等他下了马，然后去问问他。”
那人下了马，来到唐吉诃德对面的房间。
原来店主也给了他一个楼下的房间。在那间房子里也挂着同唐吉诃德这个房间一样的皮雕画。新来的客人换了身夏天的衣服，来到客店门口。门口宽敞凉爽。他见唐吉诃德正在门口散步，便问道：
“请问您要到哪儿去，尊贵的大人？”
唐吉诃德答道：
“离这儿不远的一个村庄。我是那儿的人。您准备到哪儿去？”
“我嘛，大人，”那人说道，“要去格拉纳达，那儿是我的故乡。”
“多好的地方啊！”唐吉诃德说，“请问您尊姓大名，这对我来说很重要，只是说来话长。”
“我叫阿尔瓦罗·塔费。”那个客人答道。
唐吉诃德说道：
“有一位文坛新手刚刚出版了一本《唐吉诃德》下卷，里面有个阿尔瓦罗·塔费，大概就是您吧。”
“正是我，”那人答道，“书里的那个主人公唐吉诃德是我的老朋友，是我把他从家乡带出去的。别的不说，至少他去萨拉戈萨参加擂台赛，就是我鼓动他去的。说实在的，我真帮了他不少忙，多亏我才使他背上免受了皮肉之苦。他这个人太鲁莽。”
“那么请您告诉我，您看我有点儿像您说的那个唐吉诃德吗？”
“不像，”那人说道，“一点儿也不像。”
“那个唐吉诃德还带了一个名叫桑乔·潘萨的侍从吧？”
唐吉诃德问道。
“是有个侍从。”阿尔瓦罗说道，“虽然我听说这个侍从很滑稽，却从来没听他说过一句俏皮话。”
“这点我完全相信，”桑乔这时也插嘴道，“因为俏皮话并不是人人都会说的。尊贵的大人，您说的那个桑乔准是个头号的笨蛋、傻瓜、盗贼，我才是真正的桑乔·潘萨呢。我妙语连珠，不信您可以试试。您跟着我至少一年，就会发现我开口就是俏皮话，常常是我还没意识到自己说了什么，就把听我说话的人全都逗笑了。曼查的那位真正的唐吉诃德声名显赫，既勇敢又聪明。他多情善感，铲除邪恶，扶弱济贫，保护寡妇，惹得姑娘们为他死去活来，他唯一的心上人就是托博索的杜尔西内亚。他就是您眼前这位大人。他是我的主人，其他的所有唐吉诃德和桑乔都是骗人的。”
“天哪，一点儿也不错。”阿尔瓦罗说，“朋友，你开口几句就说得妙不可言。我原来见过的那个桑乔说得倒是不少，可是没你说得风趣。他不能说却挺能吃，不滑稽却挺傻。我敢肯定，那些专同唐吉诃德作对的魔法师也想借那个坏唐吉诃德来同我作对。我不知道该怎么说才好，但我敢发誓，那个唐吉诃德已经让我送到托莱多的天神院①去治疗了，现在又冒出一个唐吉诃德来，虽然这位大人与我那个唐吉诃德大不相同。”
①这里指疯人院。
“我是不是好人，我不知道。”唐吉诃德说，“我只知道我不是坏人。为了证明这一点，我想告诉您，阿尔瓦罗·塔费大人，我这辈子从未去过萨拉戈萨。我听说那个冒牌的唐吉诃德已经去了萨拉戈萨，准备参加擂台赛，我就不去了，以正视听。于是我直奔巴塞罗那。那儿是礼仪之邦，是外来人的安身处，是济贫处，是勇士的摇篮。它给受难之人以慰籍，给真正的朋友以交往的场所，无论地势或者风景，都是独一无二的理想之处。
“虽然我也在那儿遇到一些不愉快的事情，而且很糟糕，但毕竟亲眼见到了它，总算不虚此行。总之，阿尔瓦罗·塔费大人，我就是曼查的那位名扬四海的唐吉诃德，而不是什么欺世盗名的可怜虫。您既然是位绅士，我就请求您当着这个村的长官的面声明，您是平生第一次见到我，我不是那本书的下卷里说的那个唐吉诃德，我的这个侍从桑乔·潘萨也不是您见过的那个桑乔。”
“乐于从命。”阿尔瓦罗说，“想不到我竟同时见到了两个名字完全相同、行为却大相径庭的唐吉诃德和桑乔，真让我惊讶。我简直不能相信我见到和遇到的事情了。”
“您肯定像托博索的杜尔西内亚一样中了魔法。”桑乔说，“您可以祈求老天，让我像对待她那样，为解除附在您身上的魔法而再打自己三千多鞭子。我一定尽力，而且分文不取。”
“我不明白什么鞭子不鞭子。”阿尔瓦罗说。
桑乔说，说来话长，不过既然同路，可以在路上再慢慢讲。这时，到了吃饭的时间，唐吉诃德和阿尔瓦罗一起进餐。恰巧该村的村长来到了客店，还带了个文书。唐吉诃德请求村长，说他有权力让那位在场的绅士阿尔瓦罗·塔费在村长面前发表声明，这位绅士刚才居然没认出曼查的唐吉诃德，而这个唐吉诃德并不是托德西利亚斯一个叫阿韦利亚内达的人出版的一本《唐吉诃德》下卷里说的那个唐吉诃德。村长按照法律规定办理了这个声明，而且这个声明具有完全的法律效力。唐吉诃德和桑乔非常高兴，觉得这个声明对于他们很重要，似乎他们自己的言行还不足以证明两个唐吉诃德和两个桑乔之间的差别似的。阿尔瓦罗和唐吉诃德寒暄了一番，感觉这位曼查的唐吉诃德很明世理，于是阿尔瓦罗真的以为是自己错了，竟遇到了两个完全不同的唐吉诃德，以为是自己中了魔法。
当天下午，他们离开了那个客店，走了约半西里路，来到一个岔路口，一条路通向唐吉诃德居住的村庄，另一条则是阿尔瓦罗要走的那条路。在这段短短的路程上，唐吉诃德向阿尔瓦罗讲述了他被打败的倒霉事，以及杜尔西内亚如何中了魔法又如何摆脱魔法的事，令阿尔瓦罗惊讶不已。阿尔瓦罗拥抱了唐吉诃德和桑乔之后继续赶自己的路。唐吉诃德也接着往前走。当晚，他在一片小树林里过夜，以便让桑乔完成他尚未完成的那部分鞭笞。桑乔又像前一天晚上那样如法炮制，结果没伤着自己的背，倒把几棵山毛榉的树皮打得够呛。桑乔根本就没抽自己的背。假如他背上有个苍蝇，也不会被鞭笞轰走。唐吉诃德丝毫不差地计着数，加上前一夜打的，一共打了三千零二十九下。太阳好像早早就升起来了，想看看桑乔怎样折腾自己。天亮之后，他们又继续赶路，一路上谈的无非是阿尔瓦罗如何受了骗，他们又如何办理了正式的法律文件。
他们走了一天一夜，一路上没遇到什么值得记叙的事情。由于桑乔完成了鞭笞的任务，唐吉诃德特别高兴。他期待着天明，想看看能否在路上遇到他那位已经摆脱了魔法的杜尔西内亚。路上每碰到一个女人，唐吉诃德都要看看是不是杜尔西内亚。他坚信梅尔林的话不会有错。他这样胡思乱想着，同桑乔一起爬上了一个山坡，从山坡上可以看到他们的村庄。
桑乔一看到村庄，便跪下来说道：
“我渴望已久的家乡啊，睁开眼睛看看吧，你的儿子桑乔·潘萨回来了。他虽然没能发财，却挨足了鞭子。张开你的臂膀，也请接受你的儿子唐吉诃德吧。他虽然败在了别人手下，却战胜了自己。他对我说过，这是他所企盼的最大胜利。我现在手里有钱了。虽然我狠狠地挨了鞭子，却也算个体面的人物了。”
“别犯傻了，”唐吉诃德说，“咱们还是径直回村吧。回去以后咱们就充分发挥咱们的想象力，筹划一下咱们的牧人乐园生活吧。”
说着两人就下了山坡，进村去了。