Scene opens up at Red Base, with Simmons, Ash, Grif, Sarge, Donut and Andy. Grif is running back and forth behind Donut and Simmons.
Andy: 30, 29, 28. . .
Donut: Ah! We're all gonna die!
"That'll be fun!" Ash yells.
Grif Stops running.
Grif: More importantly, I'm going to die! That's the worst part!
"That's the best party!" Ash says.
Grif resumes running back and forth.
Sarge: Men, remain calm. This is no time to panic.
Andy: 25, 24. . .
Simmons: Sir, the world is shaking apart, the ground is opening up to swallow us and we're holding a bomb that will blow us all up before any of that happens. I submit to you that if there is any time to panic, this is that time!
Andy: 20, 19, 18. . .
Sarge: You're right, Simmons!
Grif: I guess this is it everyone!
Simmons: Does anyone have anything they wanna say?
Donut: I do! Whoa, gosh, this is such an honor! I have so many people to thank. All the little people-
Simmons: Donut! This is not the time for your pre-rehearsed academy award speech!
Donut: Well, if I don't use it now, when am I going to?
Andy: 10, 9, 8. . .
Sarge: Men, it's been an honor to serve with you, and I say that using the loosest possible definition of both the words honor and serve.
Andy: 6, 5. . .
Grif stops running momentarily, speaks, then resumes his running once again.
Grif: My only regret is that I don't have more regrets!
Andy: 4, 3. . .
Simmons: Well, if I'm gonna die, then I may as well be honest; I never respected any of you, I thought I was better than all of you this entire time, I think my skills were underappreciated and I wasted my life knowing all of you. In a way, I'm sad to die but I'm glad knowing none of you will live either. There, I said it.
Andy: 1, kaboom! . . Uh, wait, uh, ka- ugh, damn it! Ergh! Ergh! Kaboom! Uh, huh.
Earth begins quaking, then quickly stops.
Donut: The bomb was a dud?
"So lame." Ash sighs.
Andy: I-I swear that's never happened before.
Sarge: So, did you want to finish your thought there, Simmons?
Simmons looks at Sarge while Grif and Donut look at Simmons.
Simmons: Well, this is awkward.
Andy: Yeah, tell me about it.
Cut to Blue base. Tucker, Caboose, Church and Tex are all present.
Tucker: Okay, we're all set!
Caboose: Okay, I'm driving.
Tucker: What? Fuck no!
Tex: C'mon Church, get in!
Church: I'm not coming.
Tucker: You're not?
Church: Nah, you guys go. Good luck. I don't know how much time we have left. I think I'd rather spend it someplace I like. Oh, and if you see Agent Washington, do me a favor and tell him I said "Memory is the key." He'll know what that means. Oh, and also, tell him I said thanks. Good luck guys.
Tex: Well, I'm going. You can sit around til the world ends but as long as I'm here, there's something I can do about it.
Church: Tex, I wouldn't expect anything less.
Caboose: Church, I-
Tucker: Ah, crap!
Tex: This tank needs to move, right now!
Cut to red base.
Sarge: Everyone, get in the digger!
Simmons: It's no use, Sarge, there's no time!
Donut: Repent! Repent! Give up your evil ways! The end is nigh!
Simmons: Oh shut up, Donut!
Grif: Yeah, did you suddenly find God or something?
Donut: Yeah, I've never been much for religion. But I figure I can get it just under the wire. Why not change my bet?
Grif: Calm down. The world is not ending. Everything will be just fine. Everyone always thinks the world's gonna end during their lifetime, but the truth is none of us are that cool or interesting, so get over it.
Simmons: At the current rate of decay, the world will shake itself apart in just a few minutes!
Andy: Hey, does this team's health insurance plan cover the apocalypse?
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Grif: Oh, give it a rest, Andy.
Cut to Freelancer base, in the middle of what looks like a locker room. Agents New York, Minnesota, and North Dakota are present.
"List changed again." North says.
"Yep." York replies.
Ash rolls his right shoulder while rubbing it..
"Lot's of things changing these days." York says.
Minnesota opens his locker up and grabs his knife and attaches it to the left side of his chest.
York grabs his old helmet and closes his locker. "I think we've got more change on the way." He tosses his old helmet away.
"I think that also." Minne says.
"You feel it too?" North asks and he sits down on a bench.
Minne takes his helmet off, but his head is hidden by the locker door.
"I felt it since Texas showed up," York starts. "And when cops and military start shooting as us, yeah. I find it just keep coming back to the same question in my head, over and over again."
"And what question is that?" North asks.
"We're the good guys... right?"
Minne puts his helmet back on and closes his locker.
North stands up. "Yeah, 'course we are."
"We're fighting people who are threatening the safety of the UNSC." Minne says.
"Yeah, you two don't sound so sure of yourselves." York says.
"No..." North sighs. "No, I supposed I don't."
South walks past the ranking board, looks at it, then storms out.
Minne is looking at a photo.
"I hope Callie is ok." Minne whispers.
C.T. is at a monitor, talking to an Insurrectionist.
C.T.: I'm trying. I understand, I-I just need more time to-
C.T. looks over to find Agent Washington walk up and look at her.
C.T.: I have to go. What're you looking at? Mind your own business.
Washington: I should say the same.
C.T. storms out.
Cut to Blood Gulch, Caboose and Tucker are driving around inside Sheila.
Caboose: Punch it, Tucker!
Tucker: I am punching it!
Caboose: Well, punch it harder! Wait, try kicking it!
Tucker: Caboose, this is as fast as this thing gets. It's a tank, not a fucking Lamborghini!
Church: Good luck guys.
Tex: So, think they'll make it?
Church: Oh, I think they have enough time to squeeze in one last adventure. Can't really ask for more than that, can you?
Tex: Suppose not.
Church: So, you decided to stay?
Tex: Yep.
Church: Finally gave in and believed me, eh?
Tex: Ah, not exactly. I just figured you haven't steered me wrong so far, why bet against a streak?
Church: Well, come sit with me then. I got some great seats for the end of the world. I saved you one.
Tex: Okay. Sure you wanna do this?
Church: Yeah, you know it took a couple versions of me to understand it but I think sometimes, sometimes you just gotta let go. And if you do, the things you let go can sometimes come back on their own. They did today.
Tex: Wow, guess the theory has proven right then. Nick of time.
Church: Yeah, I guess it was.
Tex: Any regrets?
Church: Eh, a few. Probably should've learned how to use this damn sniper rifle.
Tex: You guys did have a lot of down time. Could've practiced, I don't know, once or twice.
Church: Well, what can I tell you? Had other things on my mind, I guess.
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07-18-2022