We returned to Junonia with a red-faced Ara and stunned Ceres. I realized that I hadn’t regaled the entire tale of Tristan’s kidnapping—er, rescuing—to anyone. Ravyn was really the only one who knew most of it since she’d gone in with me. She was also the only person who understood the insane transitions the [Impersonate Soul] scrolls had when you swapped to a member of the opposite sex.
And this is probably obvious, but Ara was not happy to hear how I’d, uh, fed Tristan the potion. To be honest, I’d tried not to think about it too much since it happened. It didn’t seem to bother him much, but Ara didn’t take it well. Keke kept her silence, though I swore she hid her snicker beneath a well-timed coughing fit.
In summary, there weren’t a lot of words exchanged when we got back. As I hopped out of the wagon, the nervous tension in my stomach returned, and it had nothing to do with Ara or Ceres. The longer I waited to talk to Ravyn and Cannoli, the worse it was going to get.
On our way back to Keke’s house, I paused at the edge of Cannoli’s walkway and stared at her door. Ceres stalled next to me, looking between me and the house.
“Sir Matt?” she asked.
Keke caught on and touched Ceres’ shoulder. “Let’s wash up at my house. I’ll make us some tea.”
“But, Matt—” Ceres began, then caught Keke’s stare. “R-right. Of course.”
I waited until they disappeared inside Keke’s house, then approached Cannoli’s door. Will she answer? I swallowed. You’re not fourteen anymore, Matt. Don’t mess this up. With one more deep breath, I knocked.
The seconds ticked by in silence. I reached in my [Cat Pack] and tugged the rabbit free. Its fur was soft like Cannoli’s skin, pink like her hair. God, please answer.
At last, the door creaked open. But it wasn’t Cannoli’s face that greeted me.
“Mou ii. About time,” Ravyn hissed. “We wondered if you’d ever come back.”
I stuffed the rabbit back into my pack. “Ravyn—”
“Get in here.” She stepped back and jerked her chin to the side.
Cannoli sat at the table, the dark circles beneath her eyes gone, and the cheerful sheen I’d grown to adore had returned. A plate of baked cookies shaped and frosted like Ball Gag sat at the table’s center with a tea kettle beside them. The parrot himself and Buttons were nowhere to be seen.
“W-welcome back, Matt.” She smiled, tracing the rim of her cup with her fingertip. Her shoulders slouched, and her ears were lowered against her head.
Is she afraid I’m mad? “It’s really good to see you. Both of you.” I couldn’t kick the nerves yet; this could be the calm before the storm.
“Sit,” Ravyn commanded, pulling a third chair back from the table before retaking her seat.
I did as I was told, terrified to say the wrong thing. Felt like if I moved too fast I would startle Cannoli into a panicked sprint. Instead, she poured me a cup of tea and added two sugar cubes before passing it my way. I accepted it and chanced a sip before setting it back on the table. Should I say something? I didn’t know what was expected of me in this situation.
“So, I—” Ravyn began.
“I think—” Cannoli murmured.
They paused and looked at each other, then broke into awkward smiles. Cannoli shifted in her chair, and Ravyn grabbed one of the parrot-shaped cookies and bit off its head.
“I’m sorry, Ravyn. You go first,” Cannoli squeaked.
“Alright,” Ravyn said, bits of cookie spraying from her lips. She chased it with a drink of tea and cleared her throat. “I’m sorry, Matt.”
I couldn’t feel my toes. Ravyn? Apologizing? “Why?” I couldn’t stop myself. I’d spent almost a week wondering how best to grovel at her feet to regain her trust, and here she was, apologizing first.
“Baka! Because I—!” Ravyn stopped herself. She ran a hand through her hair and flicked her ears. After one long exhale, she started again with a softer tone. “Because I misplaced my feelings and pushed you too far. And I got pissed at you for it. That wasn’t how it was supposed to go.”
I wonder what it was you wanted to happen? “Thanks, Ravyn. Really, though. I’m sorry, too. I should have stopped it.”
She laughed beneath her breath. “Yeah, right. We all know how easy you can be.”
My cheeks and ears burned. But if she was making jokes like that again, that was a good sign. “You’re probably right.”
“Kuso. I’m always right.” She bit down to the wing on her cookie, then said while chewing, “Your turn, Cannoli.”
“O-okay.” Cannoli laid her hands in her lap and stared into her teacup. “I’m scared, Matt.” Her words quivered on her tongue.
“Why?”
“A lot of things. I’m afraid of blood. I’m afraid of losing my friends. I’m afraid that I’m not good enough to be in your Party, but if I’m not there to help, one of you may die.” Cannoli toyed with her tail. Her hair fell over her shoulder. “I’m afraid if I can’t get control of my feelings, I’ll… I’ll—” She sucked in a shaking breath. “I’ll be taken away from you.”
“Cannoli, I would never let anyone—” I began.
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Ravyn held up her hand and shook her head. “You wouldn’t have a choice, Matt. This is a promise you can’t keep.”
“It happened to m-my mom.” Cannoli’s voice broke. “She loved my dad, and they took her away.”
Holy shit. “Who took her?”
“The Queen’s Guard. There’s a reward for turning in criminals,” Ravyn explained. “That’s how they’re seen. As criminals.”
Tears escaped the corners of Cannoli’s eyes. “I’ve been praying so much. And so hard. Why won’t Saoirse listen to me?”
I ran a hand through my hair. What could I say? Don’t travel with your friends anymore, Cannoli? Just shut out your feelings? “Cannoli, I want to help. How can I help?”
“I don’t know.” She sniffled and rubbed her nose against the back of her wrist.
“Hey. We talked about this.” Ravyn popped the rest of her cookie in her mouth and laid her arm across Cannoli’s shoulders. “Someone has to find out. No one in this Party is going to tell on you, alright?”
“That’s what mom thought, too,” Cannoli squeaked.
Ravyn shook her head. “Those bitches would have to get through all of us. Matt may not be able to stop them on his own, but we’re an unstoppable Party, remember?”
I blinked. This was a side of Ravyn I didn’t remember. Apologizing? Consoling Cannoli? Should I put her through a Voight-Kampff test? “You still want to be a Party, then, Ravyn?”
Ravyn scoffed, opened her mouth for another biting reply, then closed it. She looked at Cannoli, then nodded. Her voice dropped, and I barely caught her next words, “This Party was the best thing that could have happened to me.”
I burned her words and the scene before me into my memory. Ravyn’s moments of vulnerability were few and far between, and I wanted to cling to it. They were like precious stones in the abrasive desert of her personality.
Cannoli dabbed her eyes with a napkin, and I took another drink of my tea, searching the hurricane of potential things I could say to her for the right ones. I was scared, too. That if I didn’t know how to properly console her now, we were going to lose her.
“Cannoli, I can’t stop all of your fears.” I set my cup back on the table and brushed my damp palms against my jeans. “But I can stand by your side with you while you face them. And I know you can face them. I’ve seen you do it over and over again.”
Her ruby eyes widened, and she fretted her lower lip.
“Ravyn’s right. There are going to be circumstances where I can’t protect you. Those are the times I need all of you most. That’s how it’s supposed to work—we’re a team. No one can ever fault you for caring for your Party.”
“If they do, we’ll give them hell,” Ravyn added.
I nodded. “It’s your choice what you want to do now. No one’s going to force you either way. What do you want to do?”
Cannoli sniffed, looked at Ravyn, then back to me. A smile quirked the sides of her mouth, and her ears perked. “I want to stay with you. All of you. You guys are the best thing to happen to me, too.”
I finally breathed a sigh of relief and relaxed in the chair. My girls. All of them back together. Thank Christ.
“Hey. What was in your hands when I answered the door?” Ravyn asked.
“Oh, right!” I snatched the rabbit from my [Cat Pack] and passed it to Cannoli. “Straight from Abalone.”
Cannoli squealed with delight and accepted the stuffed rabbit. She squeezed it between her arms and rocked it back and forth. “A bunny! I love it!”
“Don’t forget to make a wish,” I reminded her.
“You remembered!” Cannoli laughed, and the sound warmed the room. “I’ll make it a really good one!”
I hadn’t realized how heavy my heart had felt until I heard her laugh again. Like the weight of the world had been lifted.
“What’d you get for me?” Ravyn snickered.
I leaned forward and crossed my arms on the table. “How does payback on Celestia sound?”
Ravyn gasped, then mimicked my posture on the table. Her eyes narrowed, and she wore a wicked smile. “I’m listening.”
