*The Interview: no fake fruit, it's on a farm.*
****
For once, Josh was pleasantly surprised. Right now, he required trustworthy slav— volunteers to help him run the school. They would be in charge of all the odd tasks: cooking, ensuring security, healing the broken bodies, etc.
He had expected the choice of staff to be long and excruciating, but for once, the reality had been far simpler than fiction! How amazing was that!
Frank had sent all of the information over. The initial plan had been to only select a few of them, but the changes that had happened recently had been drastic and for the better.
All the people left apparently had incredible unity and sky-high loyalty to the Farm, weird right? How wonderful that not only had a tragedy been avoided back then, but it now served as fuel to drive their character growth.
They were said to be extremely hungry for power: in case a villain targeted them once more, they would be ready. That was as good a motivation as it could get in his eyes.
As Josh disembarked from the flying car, he was confronted with almost a hundred Climbers organized in neat rows. They all remained silent as they threw suspicious gazes his way, looked at Welner to make sure he was fine, and glanced questioningly at Frank.
In their midst, a few recognized him as the sloth guy as they opened their mouths in shock. Meanwhile, Josh began walking along the lines, inspecting every individual while tersely nodding in approval from time to time.
They went with the mood and remained cautiously still. Not only was Frank walking to welcome the newcomer, but there was also that crazy powerful fleet above their head. The scene was quite surreal.
"So, Frank. These are the people you recommended? That's a lot of them, isn't it?" Josh made small talk and gave the illusion that their numbers were too high. The available spots being scarce would raise the value of this training in their minds.
"Yes, but I've spent time with them, and they are all trustworthy! What they lack in potential they make up for in will and determination." Frank assured him with a twinkle of hope in his eyes.
"I see." Josh nodded, observing them all.
Some were young, some were middle-aged, and some looked middle-aged but exuded an ancient aura. The way they moved and stood made him feel that way, at least. All were Climbers with about a 50% split of both genders.
Josh kept gazing intensely at them, nodding at times and sometimes shaking his head. He had his hands behind his back, a proud demeanor, and exuded confidence. This only exacerbated their curiosity.
He paused in the very center of their formation and waited a few seconds until a somewhat oppressive silence reigned. He then spoke slowly and very articulately. "Frank has told me that you guys wish to become stronger."
They all unconsciously nodded, many clenching their fists and straightening their backs. He definitely had their undivided attention now.
"Let me introduce myself first. I am Josh Motherfucking Malum. For anyone that doesn't watch the news, there were a few sloths invading Metropolis-D recently. I'm the one that took care of that small problem."
They all appeared flabbergasted as Josh could see them react to every keyword. Motherfucking?! 'Few sloths' and 'small problem'?! They were nightmarish creatures! This man was the one that had solved it?!
"Now, I'm opening a school to teach Climbers. It will work very similarly to all the other ones existing, except it won't be a fucking daycare. There will be blood, sweat, hardships, friendship, and magic— whatever, you name it!"
Climber schools compared to daycares?! They couldn't help but react strongly to that statement. The MTA itself had been endorsing these Climber schools! What kind of madness would his be like?
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"I'm going to assume that no one here is fucking blind and that you've seen these lovely warships above our heads, yes? They're big, black, hard, and throbbing as the engines keep them floating."
Some could be heard gulping while others became flushed for some obscure reason. Perhaps they were warship enthusiasts?
"Very soon, I'll be going back to Metropolis-D and maybe bringing a few of you along. Of course, that is if you guys show enough potential. I'd rather not waste my energy on people so weak that they have a mental breakdown on day 1."
Many sucked in cold breaths as they heard that small remark. What kind of school had people fail to get through the first day?!
"Here is how this will play out. We'll go inside one of the big farm buildings in the back, and I'll interview every single one of you quickly. Of course, I want the group pre and post-interview separated."
They all nodded. At this point, they had entirely forgotten that Josh had never asked them if they wanted to join at all. He had just gone: I'm awesome, my school is awesome (in a humble way), and he had chosen for them.
"Alright, lead the way, Frank. Let's get this over quickly."
****
Before long, Josh was seated in a very comfy rocking chair in a small empty room. His peaceful swinging would be the very first thing that these extremely nervous interviewees would see.
Why the heck would he do that? Well, it was comfy, very comfy, and very very comfy. Oh, and it was so fun to see their faces as they entered. They were shocked, confused, and so destabilized!
A young man entered. He had a kind face, was slightly shaking all over, and yet there was a light in his eyes. His attention was instantly captured by the rhythmic sound that was filling the room.
*Loud sound of squeaking wood*
Josh stared at the man's eyes in silence, slowly rocking. He then began emitting the tiniest hints of killing intent. He progressively raised the intensity in an unnoticeable manner.
This man would be like a frog in cold water, failing to realize that someone was boiling his surroundings—killing intent version.
"…" Josh remained silent.
"…" The man was twisting his fingers from the stress.
*Loud sound of squeaking wood*
"…"
"…" He began to sweat nervously.
*Loud sound of squeaking wood*
"…"
"…" His knees showed signs of bending.
*Loud sound of squeaking wood*
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"…"
"…" He was trembling all over as if an epileptic patient.
That's when the chair stopped squeaking as Josh reigned in his killing intent. The young man returned to his senses, looking everywhere in confusion. How could silence be so 'Loud'?!
"Alright, you can go. Send the next one in." Josh calmly ordered him.
He left as if in a trace. He looked like he didn't have a single clue what had happened in there, and he could even be seen glancing back disoriented. His shoulders were slumped from the shame of failing to understand the nature of the test!
A few minutes later, a young woman entered. She was small, looked cute but had a certain valiance in her eyes. She was probably internally repeating to herself to stay strong right at this moment.
Josh repeated the earlier scene with the same rhythm and intensity. She opened her mouth, but he gestured her to remain quiet before she could inquire about anything.
*Loud sound of squeaking wood*
"…"
"…" She was staring at him without even blinking.
*Loud sound of squeaking wood*
"…"
"…" She began to tap her foot and show signs of fatigue.
*Loud sound of squeaking wood*
"…"
"…" She repeatedly kept blinking as she pinched herself to focus.
*Loud sound of squeaking wood*
"…"
"…" Her face was now a mask of fright.
That is when Josh stopped rocking before uttering: "I will now ask you a question."
She regained her senses, but she looked at him as if he was a monster. He had scared her shitless while doing absolutely nothing! How?! She forced herself to pay attention: her whole life could very well depend on this single answer.
"Where did you get that killer robot?" Josh asked her.
"W-what?!"
"That right there on your jacket. You have a cute killer robot keychain. Where did you get that?" Josh asked sternly.
She began panicking. While she tried to hide her emotions, it was all apparent. Was she about to fail because of a mere keychain?! This would obviously be weighing her down as the cute chibi figurine didn't look soldier-like at all!
"I-I can get rid of it! This way, it won't affect the school's image!" She stammered hurriedly.
"Why would you get rid of it? It's super cute!" Josh asked, perplexed.
"I-I can get you one if you like it." She replied unconsciously and instantly regretted it. He had probably been making random small talk. Why had she talked back?!
"Oh, nice! I'll take you up on that offer then. Oh right, you can go and call the next candidate in."
She left bewildered and unsteady on her feet. What the fuck had just happened in there?! Had she just accidentally bribed Josh?! Why would he care about such a cheap trinket in the first place?!
But most importantly, how come she couldn't even withstand his mere presence?! Not only was she a Climber, but she had been in many fights in the past. This didn't make any sense!
****
As she arrived on the other side of the door, she saw Frank waiting there.
"How did it go?" He curiously asked her.
"Bad? Horrible? Disastrous? I don't fucking know?!" She spat out, trying to get rid of this weird feeling the man had given her.
He had intimidated her, made her lose her bearings, and yet he had done nothing! She wanted to believe he had used a skill, but that somehow felt like a lie.
"What exactly happened in there? Did he ask you any question?" Frank had heard how the previous interview had gone.
"He asked me where I bought my keychain..." She whispered in confusion before leaving.
"Keychain?!" Frank was at a loss too.
At least, he was convinced that there really wouldn't be any cheating going on. After all, how could that be possible when no one even understood the test in the first place?!
He directed another candidate in worriedly. Meanwhile, Josh was inside having a great time...
Creator's Thought
Who said that interviewing candidates has to be long and difficult? While that method was a little bit out of the box it did have many advantages: 1. Raise credibility and status. 2. Test their breaking point. 3. Have fun looking at their faces.