The smell of flowers starting to bloom wafted by me on a warm breeze. May in Rome was warm. Far warmer than December.
I closed my eyes and imagined how it would happen. He would come around the corner, and I would see him there, waiting for me. We would run into each other's arms and finally kiss. The kiss I had wondered about many times.
The warm wind was gone as quickly as it had come, but I still felt something. Suddenly lips brushed against mine. My instinct was to open my eyes, but I didn’t. I let the kiss be frightening and exciting.
Hands grabbed at my arms, pressing me into the pillar. Lips caressed and sucked, massaging mine slowly. The stranger’s tongue brushed lightly against my lips, as if asking permission to go farther. I could feel the intensity of his body against mine. He vibrated as if he wanted to go farther but forced himself to remain controlled.
I caught a scent I would know anywhere and smiled against his face, still not opening my eyes, "France?"
"Hi, Jacqueline."
My arms shot up, wrapping around his neck. He lifted me up into his arms but pressed me against the ancient pillar. His body against mine was familiar, and yet, exciting and somehow new.
His tongue still never made its way into my mouth; he still teased with the kiss, regardless of the fact our bodies were begging for everything all at once. He stopped kissing and pressed his forehead against mine, breathing ragged breath against my chin, "You aren’t disappointed?"
I shook my head.
It was odd but true, I was excited it was him. It was the sweetest thing he had ever done and it made him the person I wanted him to be.
He put me down and took one of my hands in his. We were shaking with need and excitement but he did the unexpected. He led me to the door of the art gallery.
He paid and pulled me through the familiar surroundings. He pulled me to the picture with the guy staring into the reflection of himself.
He stopped and stared at it, "This is my favorite. I don’t see it the way everyone else does. I think he's looking at himself and seeing all the mistakes he's made and all the regrets in his life, and he's stuck there, trying to find the point where it all went wrong. He doesn’t see perfection, he sees regret and mistakes."
My eyes filled with tears.
He looked back at me, "The day I left your parents’ house like a chicken shit after Phil proposed. That was the day it all went wrong. I should have walked out of that room, punched Phil, the douche, in the face, thrown his ring at your father and dragged you out of that house. I should have married you and made you happy every day. I think I've been like this guy here, just stuck staring at the reflection and trying to find a way to fix it all."
My lip quivered.
He wiped my tears, "I am so sorry it took me so long, Jack." He got down on his knee, stunning me. He pulled something I never imagined from his pocket, "I'm not going to rush into a wedding and a relationship, I expect to win you over the right way. You deserve that. But I wanted to give you this as a symbol of my love." He handed me the deed to the vineyard in North Carolina. The paper shook in my hands. "Sometimes you just need something good to happen to you. You're the good thing for me and I want to be your good thing." He reached up, drying my tears. I was frozen.
He smiled, "Stop doing that freezing up thing and say you love me."
I dropped to my knees too, in front of him, "I don’t deserve you. I should have said no to my father and Phil faster."
He leaned over, kissing my face, "Jack, I always knew we'd find our way here, eventually."
I sniffled and leaned into the kiss. "You've always been home, France. Always." I realized then, that home wasn’t so much a place as it was a feeling. I had never felt at home in my house. I had never felt at home in my life. But with him, I had always felt at home. The only time I ever truly slept was when I was with him. The safety wasn’t strength, it was the comfort of being loved and accepted, regardless of the flaws.
I nodded, "I will pay you back every dime."
He chuckled, "Stop being a pain in the ass and come home with me."
I nodded, "Home." It was wherever he was.
"Somehow we always take the long way home, Jack."
I wrapped my arms around his neck and let him lead me from the Gallery of Ancient Arts and out to the car he had waiting.
"What's the rush? We could stay overnight."
He shook his head, "I have a playoff game in fourteen hours. It's eight and a half just to fly back."
I frowned, "You came here between games?"
He sighed, "Yeah, when me and Luce worked this out, we didn't take into account playoff games. Not smart."
I scowled, "He told you about the meeting?"
He shook his head, "It's a long story."
"It's a long flight."
He winked, "I don’t want to talk, Jack. I wanna join the mile-high club."
I wrinkled my nose, "Ewwww."
When we reached the airport, I understood. He had Muriel's jet.
I shook my head, "I can't do that to her plane."
He winked, "I was kidding. I need to sleep, and besides, me and you are on that celibacy kick."
I laughed, "Yeah, right."
He shook his head, "I'm not kidding. We aren’t having sex until we are sure of where we are."
I hugged him, "I am sure."
He kissed the top of my head, "Don’t tempt me."
I sat next to him and snuggled into his arm and had the best sleep I'd had in a week.
Saturday - The End of May
The sounds of Muriel and my mother cackling and telling stories, that I wouldn’t ever be able to drink away from my memories, had filled the air for hours. I was excited to see my mother so free. Muriel had been a terribly-good influence on her.
Brandi looked haunted but gave me a fake smile. Suddenly she understood what heartbreak was. It was refreshing seeing her suffer. It was her first time really feeling something.
Luce nudged me and pointed at the old barn, "What's the plan for that?"
I beamed, "Tasting bar."
He nodded, "I like it."
We stepped into the cool shade of the horrid old barn. Vines and webs made up the air around us.
"Were you disappointed it wasn’t me?"
I looked back at him and bit my lip. He smiled, "I knew you wouldn’t be. I saw how you looked at him. Did he tell you how it happened?"
I shook my head, looking around the old barn. It would make an interesting structure, once refinished.
"He came and gave me his blessing. He told me that I was the right choice for you and he would accept it."
I spun around, "He said that?"
He laughed, "He never meant it. He was sacrificing his happiness for yours. It was a big step for him. I told him that I was certain if he applied himself, he would make you far happier than I ever would or could."
"Thank you."
He nodded, "I will regret it the rest of my life, but I have never seen him this focused on something unselfish before. It's good for him to need to try."
I winked, "You set the bar pretty high for him."
He chuckled, "If you find he isn’t meeting that bar, you come find me."
I put a hand out, "Deal."
France came into the barn, "Dude. What the hell?"
Luce grinned at him, "Just making arrangements for stealing your girlfriend’s heart after you go back to being a lazy slob."
He laughed, "Screw you guys." He wrapped an arm around my shoulders and kissed the top of my head, "This barn is fucking creepy, Jack. I'm going back into the sunshine. It looks like that movie The Ring in here." He shuddered and walked back out.
Luce frowned but I laughed.
We finished the tour of the grounds with a glass of wine in the small building currently used as a tasting room and restaurant. The old man, Mr. MacKenzie, poured me a glass of the cabernet. He smiled as I took the first sip.
I closed my eyes, "Plums and tobacco?"
He nodded, "Yes. Some people get a hint of black cherry but only the good palates can pick up the plum. It's fruitier than the French cab sauv but that is a new world taste. The grapes have reacted to the new world with a slightly fruitier taste. Still nice and dry though."
I smiled, "It's delicious. The mother grape skins went into this as well?"
He smiled, "She goes in every bottle, even if it's just a little. The tradition was taken from the old Valpolicella wines."
I looked at Luce. He sipped and nodded, "Very smart. It gives it an old-world flavor."
Mr. MacKenzie pointed at him, "Exactly."
Mom and Muriel took him my the arm, "Show us the rest of the vineyard, Stanley."
I grimaced. France laughed, "Your mom and Muriel are like cougars."
Brandi wrinkled her nose, "Oh gross. I don’t even want to think about it."
France came and took my hand, leading me to the far side of the small room, "Are you happy?" His eyes were worried. I stood on my tiptoes, "That isn’t a strong enough word for it." I brushed my lips against his softly.
He smiled, "I love you, Jack."
I sighed, "I know."
Luce interrupted our kiss, "I'm taking Brandi back to the hotel. She is feeling the heat."
"Thank you."
He nodded at me and waved at Mike, "See ya later."
Mike waved. He looked down at me, "I wish he was less awesome."
I laughed and slapped his arm, "You go through what he's been through and try to not come out either bitter and horrid or totally awesome. He was prepared to never play again and that’s when his father started to love him. That’s awful."
He sighed, "You rich people are weird."
I nodded, "I agree."
He led me from the small building to the long, grassy trail. It led to the beach. We sat down in the sand and watched the waves. The warmth off the coast was amazing.