Part 2 Chapter 35

They saw advancing towards them, to the sound of this pleasing music, what they call a triumphal car, drawn by six grey mules with white linen housings, on each of which was mounted a penitent, robed also in white, with a large lighted wax taper in his hand. The car was twice or, perhaps, three times as large as the former ones, and in front and on the sides stood twelve more penitents, all as white as snow and all with lighted tapers, a spectacle to excite fear as well as wonder; and on a raised throne was seated a nymph draped in a multitude of silver-tissue veils with an embroidery of countless gold spangles glittering all over them, that made her appear, if not richly, at least brilliantly, apparelled. She had her face covered with thin transparent sendal, the texture of which did not prevent the fair features of a maiden from being distinguished, while the numerous lights made it possible to judge of her beauty and of her years, which seemed to be not less than seventeen but not to have yet reached twenty. Beside her was a figure in a robe of state, as they call it, reaching to the feet, while the head was covered with a black veil. But the instant the car was opposite the duke and duchess and Don Quixote the music of the clarions ceased, and then that of the lutes and harps on the car, and the figure in the robe rose up, and flinging it apart and removing the veil from its face, disclosed to their eyes the shape of Death itself, fleshless and hideous, at which sight Don Quixote felt uneasy, Sancho frightened, and the duke and duchess displayed a certain trepidation. Having risen to its feet, this living death, in a sleepy voice and with a tongue hardly awake, held forth as follows:

 

I am that Merlin who the legends say

The devil had for father, and the lie

Hath gathered credence with the lapse of time.

Of magic prince, of Zoroastric lore

Monarch and treasurer, with jealous eye

I view the efforts of the age to hide

The gallant deeds of doughty errant knights,

Who are, and ever have been, dear to me.

Enchanters and magicians and their kind

Are mostly hard of heart; not so am I;

For mine is tender, soft, compassionate,

And its delight is doing good to all.

In the dim caverns of the gloomy Dis,

Where, tracing mystic lines and characters,

My soul abideth now, there came to me

The sorrow-laden plaint of her, the fair,

The peerless Dulcinea del Toboso.

I knew of her enchantment and her fate,

From high-born dame to peasant wench transformed

And touched with pity, first I turned the leaves

Of countless volumes of my devilish craft,

And then, in this grim grisly skeleton

Myself encasing, hither have I come

To show where lies the fitting remedy

To give relief in such a piteous case.

O thou, the pride and pink of all that wear

The adamantine steel! O shining light,

O beacon, polestar, path and guide of all

Who, scorning slumber and the lazy down,

Adopt the toilsome life of bloodstained arms!

To thee, great hero who all praise transcends,

La Mancha’s lustre and Iberia’s star,

Don Quixote, wise as brave, to thee I say —

For peerless Dulcinea del Toboso

Her pristine form and beauty to regain,

‘T is needful that thy esquire Sancho shall,

On his own sturdy buttocks bared to heaven,

Three thousand and three hundred lashes lay,

And that they smart and sting and hurt him well.

Thus have the authors of her woe resolved.

And this is, gentles, wherefore I have come.

“By all that’s good,” exclaimed Sancho at this, “I’ll just as soon give myself three stabs with a dagger as three, not to say three thousand, lashes. The devil take such a way of disenchanting! I don’t see what my backside has got to do with enchantments. By God, if Senor Merlin has not found out some other way of disenchanting the lady Dulcinea del Toboso, she may go to her grave enchanted.”

“But I’ll take you, Don Clown stuffed with garlic,” said Don Quixote, “and tie you to a tree as naked as when your mother brought you forth, and give you, not to say three thousand three hundred, but six thousand six hundred lashes, and so well laid on that they won’t be got rid of if you try three thousand three hundred times; don’t answer me a word or I’ll tear your soul out.”

On hearing this Merlin said, “That will not do, for the lashes worthy Sancho has to receive must be given of his own free will and not by force, and at whatever time he pleases, for there is no fixed limit assigned to him; but it is permitted him, if he likes to commute by half the pain of this whipping, to let them be given by the hand of another, though it may be somewhat weighty.”

“Not a hand, my own or anybody else’s , weighty or weighable, shall touch me,” said Sancho. “Was it I that gave birth to the lady Dulcinea del Toboso, that my backside is to pay for the sins of her eyes? My master, indeed, that’s a part of her — for, he’s always calling her ‘my life’ and ‘my soul,’ and his stay and prop — may and ought to whip himself for her and take all the trouble required for her disenchantment. But for me to whip myself! Abernuncio!”

As soon as Sancho had done speaking the nymph in silver that was at the side of Merlin’s ghost stood up, and removing the thin veil from her face disclosed one that seemed to all something more than exceedingly beautiful; and with a masculine freedom from embarrassment and in a voice not very like a lady’s , addressing Sancho directly, said, “Thou wretched squire, soul of a pitcher, heart of a cork tree, with bowels of flint and pebbles; if, thou impudent thief, they bade thee throw thyself down from some lofty tower; if, enemy of mankind, they asked thee to swallow a dozen of toads, two of lizards, and three of adders; if they wanted thee to slay thy wife and children with a sharp murderous scimitar, it would be no wonder for thee to show thyself stubborn and squeamish. But to make a piece of work about three thousand three hundred lashes, what every poor little charity-boy gets every month — it is enough to amaze, astonish, astound the compassionate bowels of all who hear it, nay, all who come to hear it in the course of time. Turn, O miserable, hard-hearted animal, turn, I say, those timorous owl’s eyes upon these of mine that are compared to radiant stars, and thou wilt see them weeping trickling streams and rills, and tracing furrows, tracks, and paths over the fair fields of my cheeks. Let it move thee, crafty, ill-conditioned monster, to see my blooming youth — still in its teens, for I am not yet twenty — wasting and withering away beneath the husk of a rude peasant wench; and if I do not appear in that shape now, it is a special favour Senor Merlin here has granted me, to the sole end that my beauty may soften thee; for the tears of beauty in distress turn rocks into cotton and tigers into ewes. Lay on to that hide of thine, thou great untamed brute, rouse up thy lusty vigour that only urges thee to eat and eat, and set free the softness of my flesh, the gentleness of my nature, and the fairness of my face. And if thou wilt not relent or come to reason for me, do so for the sake of that poor knight thou hast beside thee; thy master I mean, whose soul I can this moment see, how he has it stuck in his throat not ten fingers from his lips, and only waiting for thy inflexible or yielding reply to make its escape by his mouth or go back again into his stomach.”

Don Quixote on hearing this felt his throat, and turning to the duke he said, “By God, senor, Dulcinea says true, I have my soul stuck here in my throat like the nut of a crossbow.”

“What say you to this, Sancho?” said the duchess.

“I say, senora,” returned Sancho, “what I said before; as for the lashes, abernuncio!”

“Abrenuncio, you should say, Sancho, and not as you do,” said the duke.

“Let me alone, your highness,” said Sancho. “I’m not in a humour now to look into niceties or a letter more or less, for these lashes that are to be given me, or I’m to give myself, have so upset me, that I don’t know what I’m saying or doing. But I’d like to know of this lady, my lady Dulcinea del Toboso, where she learned this way she has of asking favours. She comes to ask me to score my flesh with lashes, and she calls me soul of a pitcher, and great untamed brute, and a string of foul names that the devil is welcome to. Is my flesh brass? or is it anything to me whether she is enchanted or not? Does she bring with her a basket of fair linen, shirts, kerchiefs, socks — not that wear any — to coax me? No, nothing but one piece of abuse after another, though she knows the proverb they have here that ‘an ass loaded with gold goes lightly up a mountain,’ and that ‘gifts break rocks,’ and ‘praying to God and plying the hammer,’ and that ‘one “take” is better than two “I’ll give thee’s ."’ Then there’s my master, who ought to stroke me down and pet me to make me turn wool and carded cotton; he says if he gets hold of me he’ll tie me naked to a tree and double the tale of lashes on me. These tender-hearted gentry should consider that it’s not merely a squire, but a governor they are asking to whip himself; just as if it was ‘drink with cherries.’ Let them learn, plague take them, the right way to ask, and beg, and behave themselves; for all times are not alike, nor are people always in good humour. I’m now ready to burst with grief at seeing my green coat torn, and they come to ask me to whip myself of my own free will, I having as little fancy for it as for turning cacique.”

“Well then, the fact is, friend Sancho,” said the duke, “that unless you become softer than a ripe fig, you shall not get hold of the government. It would be a nice thing for me to send my islanders a cruel governor with flinty bowels, who won’t yield to the tears of afflicted damsels or to the prayers of wise, magisterial, ancient enchanters and sages. In short, Sancho, either you must be whipped by yourself, or they must whip you, or you shan’t be governor.”

“Senor,” said Sancho, “won’t two days’ grace be given me in which to consider what is best for me?”

“No, certainly not,” said Merlin; “here, this minute, and on the spot, the matter must be settled; either Dulcinea will return to the cave of Montesinos and to her former condition of peasant wench, or else in her present form shall be carried to the Elysian fields, where she will remain waiting until the number of stripes is completed.”

“Now then, Sancho!” said the duchess, “show courage, and gratitude for your master Don Quixote’s bread that you have eaten; we are all bound to oblige and please him for his benevolent disposition and lofty chivalry. Consent to this whipping, my son; to the devil with the devil, and leave fear to milksops, for ‘a stout heart breaks bad luck,’ as you very well know.”

To this Sancho replied with an irrelevant remark, which, addressing Merlin, he made to him, “Will your worship tell me, Senor Merlin — when that courier devil came up he gave my master a message from Senor Montesinos, charging him to wait for him here, as he was coming to arrange how the lady Dona Dulcinea del Toboso was to be disenchanted; but up to the present we have not seen Montesinos, nor anything like him.”

To which Merlin made answer, “The devil, Sancho, is a blockhead and a great scoundrel; I sent him to look for your master, but not with a message from Montesinos but from myself; for Montesinos is in his cave expecting, or more properly speaking, waiting for his disenchantment; for there’s the tail to be skinned yet for him; if he owes you anything, or you have any business to transact with him, I’ll bring him to you and put him where you choose; but for the present make up your mind to consent to this penance, and believe me it will be very good for you, for soul as well for body — for your soul because of the charity with which you perform it, for your body because I know that you are of a sanguine habit and it will do you no harm to draw a little blood.”

“There are a great many doctors in the world; even the enchanters are doctors,” said Sancho; “however, as everybody tells me the same thing — though I can’t see it myself — I say I am willing to give myself the three thousand three hundred lashes, provided I am to lay them on whenever I like, without any fixing of days or times; and I’ll try and get out of debt as quickly as I can, that the world may enjoy the beauty of the lady Dulcinea del Toboso; as it seems, contrary to what I thought, that she is beautiful after all. It must be a condition, too, that I am not to be bound to draw blood with the scourge, and that if any of the lashes happen to he fly-flappers they are to count. Item, that, in case I should make any mistake in the reckoning, Senor Merlin, as he knows everything, is to keep count, and let me know how many are still wanting or over the number.”

“There will be no need to let you know of any over,” said Merlin, “because, when you reach the full number, the lady Dulcinea will at once, and that very instant, be disenchanted, and will come in her gratitude to seek out the worthy Sancho, and thank him, and even reward him for the good work. So you have no cause to be uneasy about stripes too many or too few; heaven forbid I should cheat anyone of even a hair of his head.”

“Well then, in God’s hands be it,” said Sancho; “in the hard case I’m in I give in; I say I accept the penance on the conditions laid down.”

The instant Sancho uttered these last words the music of the clarions struck up once more, and again a host of muskets were discharged, and Don Quixote hung on Sancho’s neck kissing him again and again on the forehead and cheeks. The duchess and the duke expressed the greatest satisfaction, the car began to move on, and as it passed the fair Dulcinea bowed to the duke and duchess and made a low curtsey to Sancho.

 

And now bright smiling dawn came on apace; the flowers of the field, revived, raised up their heads, and the crystal waters of the brooks, murmuring over the grey and white pebbles, hastened to pay their tribute to the expectant rivers; the glad earth, the unclouded sky, the fresh breeze, the clear light, each and all showed that the day that came treading on the skirts of morning would be calm and bright. The duke and duchess, pleased with their hunt and at having carried out their plans so cleverly and successfully, returned to their castle resolved to follow up their joke; for to them there was no reality that could afford them more amusement.

 

随着优美的音乐,一辆彩车向他们开来。彩车由六匹披着白麻布的棕色骡子拉着,而每匹骡子背上都骑着一位光赎罪者①。他们都穿着白衣服,手里各举一支大蜡烛。这辆车比刚才那几辆车大两三倍,车上两侧站着另十二名赎罪者。他们的衣服比雪还白,手里也都拿着点燃的大蜡烛,让人惊奇不已。在高高的宝座上端坐着一位仙女。她身穿千层银纱,纱上又有极小的金箔点缀,即使称不上华丽,至少也可以说是引人注目。她的脸上罩着薄纱,透过轻纱,可以看到她那清秀无比的脸庞。明亮的烛光可以让人看出她的较好容貌与妙龄,看起来还不到二十岁,但是又超过十七岁。她的身旁是一个身穿拖地衣的人。那人的衣服盖到了脚面,头上还罩着黑纱巾。车子到公爵、公爵夫人和唐吉诃德面前停下了,音乐声戛然而止。接着,车上又响起了竖琴和诗琴声。穿拖地长袍的人站了起来,把衣服向两边掀开,又揭掉头上的纱巾,竟露出一具骷髅相,十分难看。唐吉诃德见了不禁有些惊慌,桑乔见了更是怕得要死,公爵和公爵夫人也有些惴惴不安。这个活骷髅站起来,声音仍带着某种睡意,舌头有些发涩地说道:

①赎罪者可分为光赎罪者和血赎罪者。前者手举蜡烛,后者鞭打自己,以示赎罪。

我就是小说中

多年误传

父亲为魔鬼的梅尔林。

我是魔法之王,琐罗亚斯德教的

君主和化身。

我与时代和世纪抗衡,

不让时代和世纪湮灭

英勇的游侠骑士的殊勋,

我眷顾他们自始至今。

虽然众多的魔法师和巫师

心狠手辣,冷酷无情,

奸诈阴险,

我却心慈手软,乐善好施,

普渡众生。

在阴森的狄斯①府里,

我的魂灵绘写符咒和字样,

聚精会神,

忽然传来了托博索的杜尔西内亚

痛苦的声音,

方得知她不幸身中魔法,

从贵夫人变成了农妇,

我心痛如焚。

在阴暗可怕的地府内,

我潜心研究,

翻阅书籍无数本,

今日方得来解除

这万恶祸根。

噢,智勇双全的唐吉诃德大人,

你是所有身披盔甲的

勇士的骄傲,

你是所有

抛弃愚梦,投笔从戎,

从事艰苦流血生涯者的

明灯和指路人。

我要告诉你,

荣获赞誉的勇士,

曼查的辉煌,西班牙的星辰,

为了恢复杜尔西内亚的

音容笑貌,

需要你的侍从桑乔

在光天化日之下,

裸露他的肥屁股

自抽三千三百鞭,

直打得他疼痛难忍。

此乃制造此劫难的魔法师们

商量决定。

我就是为此而来,谨告诸位大人。

①狄斯是冥王普卢同的别名。狄斯府指地狱。

“见他的鬼去吧!”桑乔说,“别说打三千鞭子,就是打我三鞭子,也跟捅我三刀一样疼!这叫什么解除魔法的鬼主意呀!上帝保佑,如果解除杜尔西内亚所遭受的魔法,梅尔林大人只有这个办法,那还是让杜尔西内亚带着魔法进坟墓去吧!”

“你这个乡巴佬,没有教养的东西,”唐吉诃德说,“我真该把你捆在树上,剥得一丝不挂,不是打你三千三百鞭子,而是打你六千六百鞭子,而且要打得结结实实,让你挣三千三百下也挣脱不了!你别跟我顶嘴,否则我就宰了你。”

梅尔林闻言说道:

“别这样,应该让善良的桑乔在自愿的时候自觉地吃鞭子,不要强迫。不要给他规定期限。如果桑乔愿意让别人来打,可以给他减少一半数量,不过那就可能打得重些。”

“不管是别人打还是我自己打,不管是手重还是手轻,”桑乔说,“谁也休想碰我一下。难道我是为了杜尔西内亚才活着的吗?她的脸受了罪就该让我拿屁股来补偿吗?我的主人跟她才是一回事呢,动不动就叫她‘我的宝贝’、‘我的命根子’、‘我的靠山’什么的,他才应该为杜尔西内亚受过,为杜尔西内亚摆脱魔法尽心竭力呢!为什么要打我?我‘急绝’!”

桑乔刚说完,梅尔林身边那位披着银纱的少女就站起身来,掀掉脸上的薄纱,露出一张非常美丽的脸庞。她的举止有些男子气,而且声音也不像女子,她面对桑乔说道:“你这个倒霉的侍从,愚蠢的家伙,硬心肠的东西,坏蛋,不要脸的人,人类的公敌!如果有人命令你从一个高塔上跳下来,要求你吃一打癞蛤蟆、两条蜥蜴和三条蛇,劝你用一把又长又尖的大刀把你老婆孩子都杀了,而你犹豫彷徨逃避,那倒还不算新鲜。想不到只挨三千三百鞭子,你就当回事了,孤儿院收养的那些孤儿,不管淘气不淘气,哪个月不挨鞭子?像你这么说,哪个慈善心肠的人听见了,哪怕是以后听见了,不会诧异愕然?你这个可怜而又狠心的畜生,用你那双贼眼看看我的眼睛吧,和我这双明亮的眼睛比较一下吧,你就会看到泪水正一缕缕缓慢而持续地流淌,在我美丽的面颊上形成了一条条沟沟坎坎。动动心吧,你这个卑鄙恶毒的妖怪。我正值豆蔻年华,我才十几岁,才十九岁,还不到二十岁,却要在这农妇的相貌下凋零枯萎!也许我现在的样子还不像农妇,那是这位在场的梅尔林大人特别关照的结果,而这仅仅是为了让你见到我的美貌后心肠变软。我这痛苦的美貌,即使石头见了也会变成像棉花一样软,即使猛虎见了也会变成像绵羊一样温顺。赶紧打吧,你这桀骜不驯的怪兽,拿出你吃东西的那股劲头来,恢复我平滑的肌肤、温顺的性情和秀丽的面容吧。如果你的心不愿为我所动,不愿为我效劳,你也该为你身旁这位可怜的骑士着想呀!我是指你的主人,我看见他的灵魂已经哽在喉咙里,离嘴唇不远了,只等你一个冷酷或温情的回答,就会脱口而出或者咽回肚里呢。”

唐吉诃德听到此话,用手摸了摸喉咙,转身对公爵说道:

“我向上帝发誓,大人,杜尔西内亚说的是真的,我的灵魂已经在喉咙这儿了,正哽在这里呢。”

“你说这事该怎么办呢,桑乔?”公爵夫人问。

“夫人,”桑乔说,“我还是刚才那句话,我‘急绝!’”

“应该说‘拒绝’,桑乔,你刚才说得不对。”公爵说。

“您别跟我那么较真儿。”桑乔说,“我现在没时间考虑那么细,说得差不多就行了。我应该挨的这些鞭子,或者我必须挨的这些鞭子,搅得我心烦意乱,我也不知道该怎么说,怎么做了。我倒是想知道,我们的杜尔西内亚夫人从哪儿学会了这样央求人。她让我露出肉来挨打,却骂我是愚蠢的家伙、桀骜的怪兽等一大串难听的话,谁能受得了呀!难道我的皮肉是铁打的,或者跟是否能解除魔法有什么相干?她并没有拿一筐家用的白单子、衬衫、头巾和短袜来感谢我呀!老实说,这些东西我都用不着,可是总不该一句接一句地骂我呀。她知道不知道俗话说的,‘驴背驮金,上山才有劲’,‘礼物能够打碎顽石’,‘一边求上帝,一边给实惠’,‘给一样胜过两声空许诺’?至于我的主人,也应该好好地哄我,让我高兴,我不就服服帖帖了吗?可是他却说要抓住我,剥光我的衣服,把我捆在树上,再多打一倍鞭子!若真是那样,诸位好心的大人不妨想想,挨打的人不光是侍从,而且还是总督呢!就像人们常说的,‘那就更不得了啦’!这帮人真该好好学学怎样央求人,学学讲礼貌。就是同一个人,也不会总是那么好脾气呀。我现在看见我的绿猎装撕破了正难过得要死,他们却来让我心甘情愿地挨鞭打,这不是自找没趣嘛!”

“实际上,桑乔朋友,”公爵说,“如果你不服服帖帖,你就谋不到总督的位置。如果我给我的臣民委派一个残忍冷酷、在落难女子的眼泪和德高望重的魔法师的请求面前毫不动心的总督,那合适吗?反正一句话,桑乔,或者你鞭打自己,或者让别人鞭打你,不然你就休想当总督。”

“大人,”桑乔说,“您给我两天期限,让我考虑一下哪种情况对我最好,行吗?”

“不行,绝对不行,”梅尔林说,“必须在此时此地就作出决定。或者杜尔西内亚回到蒙特西诺斯洞窟去,恢复她农妇的模样,或者让她到极乐的福地去等着你完成挨打的数目。”

“喂,好桑乔,”公爵夫人说,“你既然吃了唐吉诃德大人这碗饭,就应该鼓足劲,好好给他干。对于这样品德优秀、道德高尚的骑士,我们大家都应该效劳,满足他的要求。挨鞭子的事,你就答应吧。办事要快,免得夜长梦多。‘好心可以解厄运’,这点你很清楚。”

听公爵夫人这么一说,桑乔忽然对梅尔林胡说八道起来。

桑乔问道:

“请您告诉我,梅尔林大人,刚才那个该死的驿车向导给我的主人带来了蒙特西诺斯的口信,让我的主人在这儿等他,他要来教我的主人为杜尔西内亚解除魔法。可是到现在,我并没见到蒙特西诺斯或其他类似的人呀。”

梅尔林答道:

“桑乔朋友,那个该死的向导是个大笨蛋、大坏蛋。我派他来找你的主人,并不是叫他传达蒙特西诺斯的口信,而是传达我的口信。蒙特西诺斯现在仍在洞窟里,正等着为他解除魔法呢,尽管现在只差最后一步了。如果有什么需要他为你做的事情,或者你有什么事情要跟他商量,我可以把他叫来,把他送到你指定的任何地方。不过,现在你还是先答应挨鞭子的事儿吧。请你相信我,无论从精神上还是从肉体上,这都会对你有好处。从精神上说,它可以使你更仁慈;从肉体上说,我知道你是多血的体质,出点儿血没什么关系。”

“世界上医生真多,连魔法师都成医生了。”桑乔说,“既然大家都这么说,尽管我并不自愿,我还是说愿意挨这三千三百鞭子吧。不过有个条件,那就是必须在我高兴的时候才打,不能给我规定期限。我争取尽快把这笔帐了结,让大家都能欣赏到杜尔西内亚的美貌。看来她与我想象的不一样,真的很漂亮。我还有个条件,那就是不能要求我非得打出血不可,假如有几下打得像拍蚊子似的,那也得算数。还有,就是为了防止我数错,无所不知的梅尔林大人得认真计数,告诉我是打少了还是打多了。”

“打多了也用不着通知,”梅尔林说,“因为只要打够了数,杜尔西内亚夫人身上的魔法就会立即被解除,她就会立即跑来向好人桑乔致谢,弄好了还会奖励你呢。所以,你没有必要计较打多了或打少了。老天不会允许我欺骗任何人,哪怕是一丝一毫。”

“哎,那就干吧!”桑乔说,“我只好认倒霉了。我是说我同意挨打,但是要遵守我刚才说的那些条件。”

桑乔刚说完这句话,笛号和音乐声顿时响起,又放了一阵阵火枪。唐吉诃德勾住桑乔的脖子,在桑乔的额头和脸颊上吻个不停。公爵夫人和公爵都显出极其高兴的样子。那辆牛车走了起来,经过公爵夫妇面前时,杜尔西内亚向他们低头行礼,又向桑乔深深地鞠了一躬。

此时天已渐明,一片喜气洋洋的景象,田野间的花草昂首挺立,跳珠溅玉般的溪水在白色和褐色的卵石间低吟,汇入远处的河流。大地欢唱,天空明朗,阳光柔和,所有景象都预示着与黎明一起到来的这一天是宁静晴朗的一天。公爵和公爵夫人对打猎的结果感到满意,也为他们机智顺利地达到了预期的目的而感到高兴。他们又回到城堡,准备继续把玩笑开下去。他们觉得再没有比这更有意思的事情了。